About Maestrov
You exist, but do you live?
Maestrov - Followers
Maestrov - Followed
Maestrov's page visits
Hugged!
Maestrov's FML badges
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
    5%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    0%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    1%
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
    9%
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
    67%
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
    7%
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
    1%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    0%
The list of badges to find
Maestrov's favorite FMLs

Today, a girl in my class turned around and said, "Wow, you've got your photo on a rubber! That's amazing!" The rubber was designed to look like a £10 note, and the picture was of the Queen of England. FML

By Elizabeth / Thursday 11 December 2008 05:13 / France

Today, I was at the grocery store, waiting in line to pay. A man jumped me from behind, and my first reflex was to brutally elbow him in the face. I soon discovered my attacker was one of the patients at the disability house at which I work, and he was trying to hug me. FML

By rescuetheduck - / Tuesday 10 April 2012 19:26 / Finland - Joensuu

Today, my daughter sat me down for a long talk. It turns out that she thinks she is the Chosen One. FML

By kayadd33 / Tuesday 10 April 2012 14:13 / Canada - Richmond

Today, I noticed a strange lady following me around in the mall. After a while I began to get creeped out, so I confronted her. Apparently she has to make sure everything she buys is better than what I buy. After a long silence she said, "What? You never noticed me before?" FML

By Eliza / Wednesday 4 April 2012 03:40 / United States - San Antonio

Today, I had to patiently listen as a customer nattered on and on about how incompetent I was for not stocking the movie she was looking for. It took nearly 20 minutes to get her to calm down long enough for me to explain that there is no such movie as "Hobbits With Shotguns". FML

By Anonymous / Friday 9 March 2012 22:36 / United States