About Kiwikitten
I hate every single one of you. You are all incompetent idiots, lacking in humor and knowledge of sarcasm. You suck. Yes, I'm talking to you.
Kiwikitten - Followers
Kiwikitten - Followed
Kiwikitten's FML badges
  • Consolation prize

    Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • I moderated this!

    In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
    1,500%
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
    109,200%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    0%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    0%
  • Beginner

    You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
    20%
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    12%
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    4%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    2%
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
    215,400%
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
    533%
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
    260%
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
    40%
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
    200%
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
    96%
  • 50 quality comments

    Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
    36%
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
    21%
  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
    58%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    4%
The list of badges to find
Kiwikitten's favorite FMLs

Today, while copying some stuff for school, I felt someone rubbing her boobs against my back. I got a boner and when I looked to see who the hot chick was, I saw my fat friend rubbing his man boobs against my back. FML

By florisvanlent - / Thursday 12 February 2009 16:17 / Netherlands

Today, I told my son to go clean his mess of a room. He yelled, "Dobby has no master! Dobby is a free elf!" and walked off. He turned 18 a week ago. FML

By Anonymous / Wednesday 25 July 2012 10:54 / United States - Murrieta

Today, I'm found out I'm pregnant. My husband and I spoke at length about how we were going to handle things, which included him "forbidding" me from having an epidural, because he doesn't want our baby to "come out addicted to drugs." FML

By CalyenaL - / Sunday 13 May 2012 01:35 / Mexico - Tijuana

Today, I found out I have a kidney infection. Now I'm forced to drink at least 4 glasses of water before going to bed. I also have to be woken up every two hours to be told to, "GO PEE BEFORE YOU DIE!" by my mother. FML

By hottygirl905 / Tuesday 24 April 2012 11:50 / United States - Port Saint Lucie

Today, on my first day of a new factory job, I discovered that my new boss had lied to me about my hours. I found this out when my coworkers burst out laughing when I mentioned having the weekends off, and talking about my recreational plans. FML

By Anonymous / Sunday 22 April 2012 02:22 / United States