About Kbear3109
My name is Kelli and I'm a 26 year old stay at home mom/housewife. I have 2 little girls that are 5 years old and 4 years old. I like reading, watching Netflix, and doing crochet and knitting.
Kbear3109 - Followers
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Kbear3109's FML badges
  • Beginner

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  • Mobility

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  • I NEED to know!

    You went as far as reading the terms of use. You’re a total FML completist.
  • The rules are the rules

    Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
  • Work is a 4-letter word

    Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
  • Checking you out

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  • My diary is a collector's item

    There were only 100 numbered VDM diaries for 2011/2012. I've got one.
  • Happy ending

    Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
  • I'm an early bird, but no worm yet

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  • This isn't what should be happening

    You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done, wrong turn. Go back.
  • I moderated this!

    In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
  • Up and coming moderator

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  • Perfectionist

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  • Profile completed

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  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
  • A new thumb

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  • What'ch'all looking at?

    You have put three pictures on your profile, but not necessarily pictures of your profile.
  • 50 quality comments

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  • Consolation prize

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  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
  • Judgmental

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  • Tweet, tweet

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  • 50 favorites

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  • Santa Claus

    You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
    33%
  • One more and it's business time

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    1%
  • 42

    See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon.
    0%
  • Tell us what happened next

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    35%
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    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    69%
  • The return of the thumb

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    27%
  • Happy month-versary

    You seem to be glued to FML. Shall we set a tent up for you to sleep in?
    273%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    54%
The list of badges to find
Kbear3109's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend keeps requesting that I make eye contact when I give him blowjobs. He won't let up about it. I don't know how to break it to him that his penis is too small for me to suck and look upward at the same time. FML

By oh gee / Monday 2 May 2016 05:01 /

Today, I took my boyfriend of 2 years on a family vacation to meet my family for the first time. We all got really drunk and he made out with my dad. This was day one and we don't fly back for another 16 days. FML

By Anonymous / Saturday 2 April 2016 17:48 / United States - Portland

Today, I walked into my mother's house to find that she had knitted clothes for some of the household appliances. The toaster was wearing a dress. FML

By anon / Monday 14 January 2013 03:00 / United States - Dublin

Today, while at school, a bra fell out of my coat. After the initial shock, people started congratulating me on finally getting a girlfriend. I didn't have the heart to tell them it was my mom's. FML

By Tymer - / Friday 23 November 2012 15:56 / Canada - Malahat

Today, my cat was too overweight to get out of the litter box, so he gave up, and went to sleep. I had to pick him up out of his own waste and clean him up. FML

By Jeanna S. / Friday 23 November 2012 15:10 / United States