About Januzane
Hey you over there! Yes you. Grab a seat while I stare at you and tell stories about turtles and trains.
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Januzane's FML badges
  • Profile completed

    You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
  • The rules are the rules

    Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
  • I moderated this!

    In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • The Mixer

    You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    0%
  • 42

    See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    3%
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
    5%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    1%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    2%
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
    77%
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
    15%
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
    33%
The list of badges to find
Januzane's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom, only to find my dad sitting on the toilet, blind drunk. He screamed "YOU SHALL NOT PASS!" at me. I just wanted to shave. FML

By :/ - / Tuesday 5 November 2013 21:01 / United States - Romulus

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

By regretsteachinghighschool / Tuesday 5 November 2013 13:22 / United States - Rochester

Today, an old man looked me dead in the eyes as he reached into my tip jar, grabbed the money, and then walked out of the store as if nothing ever happened. I was so shocked that I couldn't do anything to stop him. FML

By brokeasajoke / Friday 1 November 2013 12:58 / United States - El Reno

Today, my car keys are in my house and my house keys are in my car, and I'm in neither. FML

By Argh - / Sunday 3 November 2013 20:18 / France - Saivres

Today, I had a panic attack when a huge spider ran over my hand. I screamed, wailed, and killed it with a shoe while shouting. Ten minutes later, police slammed on my door. My neighbor called them, saying it sounded like someone was being murdered. FML

By katchoo - / Sunday 3 November 2013 07:34 / Denmark