About Innocencekermitt
I've had plenty of FML times. I finally have a place to put them down to remember those wonderful moments.
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Innocencekermitt's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught two kids passing notes to each other in my class, so I told them to see me afterwards. When one of the kids eventually came up, I noticed he was crying. He looked up at me and sobbed out, "I was trying to make my first friend!" FML

By Anonymous - / Wednesday 9 September 2015 00:03 /

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

By Anonymous / Monday 22 April 2013 18:33 / United States

Today, I dressed up as Batman for a comic book convention. I was hit by a car on the way there by a man dressed up as the Joker for the same convention. FML

By ironies a b*tch / Saturday 13 April 2013 05:04 / United States - Chatham

Today, I was babysitting, and I had to pee really, really badly. I couldn't figure out how to get the stupid toilet lock off, and ended up pissing myself. As I stood in the bathroom in tears, their child screamed, "No, no, pee-pee in the POTTY!" FML

By soaked - / Monday 25 February 2013 19:16 / United States - Philadelphia

Today, I bought an eye mask to help me sleep during the day, as I work night shifts. Upon waking up after my first time using it, I forgot I was wearing it and thought I had gone blind, causing me to fall out of the bed and split my head open on my bedside table. FML

By idiot / Friday 4 January 2013 10:13 / Sweden