About His_holiness
All hail my holy balls Give me your sons as payment for me being the voice of God
His_holiness - Followers
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His_holiness's FML badges
  • Beginner

    You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • Socialite

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  • Mobility

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  • The rules are the rules

    Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by Alan, our moderator.
  • Work is a 4-letter word

    Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
  • Night owl

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  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
  • Judgmental

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  • 50 favorites

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  • Consolation prize

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  • 50 quality comments

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  • Profile completed

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  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • 42

    See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    33%
  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
    64%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    9%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    18%
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
    45%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    1%
The list of badges to find
His_holiness's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to Target to buy some soap and this 65-70 year old woman next to me was asking a sales associate if they had any bubble bath mix. I suddenly pictured her naked, bathing herself and suddenly my dick just couldn't sit still. It's probably because I haven't had sex in over 22 months. FML

By fecurtis / Friday 23 January 2009 08:36 / United States

Today, yet again, I got to my desk at work at 8 AM to find my laptop turned on and porn sites opened. Weird porn sites. I have no idea who is doing this, or how they have access to my office, or how they got my login password. HR thinks I'm making this up. FML

By MymB612 - / Tuesday 24 September 2013 11:15 /

Today, as if to prove that there is no end to the unspeakable stupidity of the human race, a patient was brought into my hospital, needing a cellphone removed from his anus. FML

By Anonymous - / Sunday 8 September 2013 16:38 / Switzerland - Bern

Today, I took my laptop to I.T. to fix my internet. Only after I left did I realise my memory technique for remembering the stages of mitosis (Iraqi penis man anally transmits chlamydia) was left as a sticky note on my desktop. The guy definitely noticed. FML

By interphaseprophasemetaphase - / Wednesday 4 September 2013 11:18 / Australia - Melbourne

Today, my boyfriend got offered a job at Abercrombie. The first thing he asked was "they only hire hot people, right?!" Now he won't stop telling me how lucky I am to be with such a hot guy. FML

By Misaki18 / Tuesday 3 September 2013 17:13 / United States