About Firewielder
Well, hello everyone and welcome to my profile! Hope you have fun here! Don't go into the basement.
Firewielder - Followers
Firewielder - Followed
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Firewielder's FML badges
  • Profile completed

    You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • I moderated this!

    In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
  • Socialite

    You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
  • Checking you out

    You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.
  • Tell us what happened next

    You've commented on an FML that you sent in
  • I like your style

    You gave a Hug to someone. How cute!
  • The Mixer

    You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
  • What'ch'all looking at?

    You have put three pictures on your profile, but not necessarily pictures of your profile.
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • One ring to rule them all

    You submitted an FML, that was subsequently published, and statistically this makes you an exceptional person.
  • Consolation prize

    Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
    14%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    0%
  • 42

    See, son, moderating FMLs is like a marathon.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    15%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    30%
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
    75%
  • 50 quality comments

    Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
    18%
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
    50%
The list of badges to find
Firewielder's favorite FMLs

Today, I discovered the downside to having a "sneak-attacks-allowed" tickle war with my 4-year-old son. I had to explain to several outraged strangers at the supermarket why my son kept flinching and pulling away whenever I made any sudden movements near him. FML

By Anonymous - / Sunday 13 July 2014 16:04 / United States - Pompano Beach

Today, out of boredom, I built my cat a little fort. Later, I decided to crawl inside to pet her, but as soon as I stuck my head in, she clawed me. I guess I'm not allowed in, then. FML

By unloved cat owner / Sunday 16 February 2014 00:50 / United States - Carmichael

Today, in the middle of telling my mother about my engagement, she suddenly broke down in tears about her problems at work and her loveless marriage, and abruptly hung up on me. FML

By nana_star - / Friday 14 February 2014 07:59 / South Africa - Johannesburg

Today, I was on a date, when I suddenly choked on my own saliva and coughed so hard that I passed out. FML

By gaiakirkland - / Saturday 15 February 2014 11:18 / Italy - Pompiano

Today, I was grading work my students had done with a sub. I realized one student had gotten hold of the teachers' edition of the textbook when I read ten papers in a row that had "Student answers may vary" as the answer to problem number four. My students can't even cheat properly. FML

By chinaski7628 / Saturday 15 February 2014 07:11 / United States - Glendale