About Blitzpkf
Just another account on fmylife.com, don't mind me. Or if you really want, you can find me on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/blitzzer0yf
Blitzpkf - Followers
Blitzpkf - Followed
Hugged!
Blitzpkf's FML badges
  • Work is a 4-letter word

    Voting on an FML in the "Work" category on a Monday morning between 8 and 9 a.m. How ironic.
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
  • Socialite

    You used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
  • Judgmental

    You have voted "You deserved it" over 100 times.
  • Consolation prize

    Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
  • Night owl

    You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 a.m.
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
  • Profile completed

    You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    46%
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    15%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    5%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    8%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    10%
  • Beginner

    You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
    40%
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
    67%
  • YDI Master

    You made your 500th "You deserved it" vote.
    97%
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
    20%
  • 50 quality comments

    Clicking to reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried afterwards is even worthier.
    10%
  • A new thumb

    You’ve used your thumb on 1000 comments.
    25%
  • 100 kick-ass comments

    100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!
    23%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    0%
The list of badges to find
Blitzpkf's favorite FMLs

Today, I nailed every single move in my routine at a gymnastics competition. I then finished off with a perfect split, letting out a fart loud enough to wake up a kid in China. FML

By LetItRip / Thursday 12 July 2012 20:35 / Czech Republic - Prague

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

By JuggaloSlasher15 - / Thursday 8 August 2013 23:03 / United States

Today, after discovering that our son is already sexually active, I asked my husband to have a talk with him. "Remember, son, it's all about the clit", wasn't what I had in mind. FML

By Anonymous / Saturday 8 June 2013 10:34 / United States - Bessemer

Today, I have to defend my client in court. The defense that my client wants me to use is, "It's not a robbery if you have swag" and then goes on saying, "The judge is bound to let me go after he sees my swag." FML

By Anonymous / Thursday 23 May 2013 01:57 / Canada - Toronto

Today, I brought my girlfriend home for the first time to meet my parents. They were having a heated argument because my mom had bought "the wrong toilet paper" and my dad was angry because "she should know that he has a sensitive anus". FML

By Sonofa / Friday 17 May 2013 15:52 / Canada - Cold Lake