About Alphonse67 Not specified
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Alphonse67's FML badges
  • It's in the can!

    Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
    400%
  • Keen reader – Level: godlike ninja

    You have voted for 100% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    1%
  • Keen reader – Level: master ninja

    You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • Keen reader – Level: student ninja

    You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
    0%
  • The return of the thumb

    You have thumbed 5000 comments.
    0%
  • The thumb strikes back

    You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.
    0%
  • Mobility

    You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.
    2,800%
  • Up and coming moderator

    It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.
    300%
  • Who’s the fairest of them all?

    This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
    133%
  • I agree, my mouse works.

    200 "I agree" votes is a good start.
    4%
  • 50 favorites

    Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already added 50 FMLs to your favourites list!
    12%
  • One more and it's business time

    You've received 68 Hugs on your profile. Kinky.
    0%
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Alphonse67's favorite FMLs

Today, trying to be kinky while giving my boyfriend a blow job, I whipped him with my ponytail. He was thrilled, until I accidentally head-butted his dick. He curled up into a ball and wouldn't let me touch him again. FML

By kinkicali - / Tuesday 20 November 2012 08:43 / United States - Maple Valley

Today, my ex-girlfriend was supposed to pick up her things. I decided to take a nap. Thirty minutes later, I woke up with two police officers hammering on my door. They'd come to get my ex-girlfriend's things and said they were "watching me." That's the last time I date a cop's daughter. FML

By Chris - / Tuesday 20 November 2012 05:03 / United States - Lakewood

Today, my long-distance boyfriend and I decided to be a bit naughty on Skype. It was 3am so we assumed that my dad was asleep and did some dirty talk. When we were done, I heard my dad laughing outside my room; he'd heard it all. FML

By Anonymous / Tuesday 20 November 2012 03:19 / Sweden - Stockholm

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. He definitely killed the mood when, while down there, he started saying, "Nomnomnomnom." FML

By wow babe / Monday 19 November 2012 17:46 / United States - Arnold

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by waking him up with a blowjob, because he had always told me that it was a sexy fantasy of his. When he finally woke up, he got pissed off, rudely accused me of interrupting his beauty sleep, then soundly lay back down and fell asleep again. FML

By nextcontestant16 / Monday 19 November 2012 15:12 / United States