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Today, I accidentally texted a picture of my cock to my dad. FML

#20907559
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25604) - you deserved it (77734)

On 10/04/2013 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was playing soccer when a player kicked the ball at my crotch. In pain, I kneeled down. The referee came up to me and whispered, "The smaller they are, the more it hurts." FML

#20911508
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41481) - you deserved it (3589)

On 10/07/2013 at 8:21pm - misc - by Agax (man) - United States (California)

Today, I'm severely sunburned and can barely walk properly. My boyfriend keeps telling his friends that it's because of "how hard he gave it to me last night". FML

#20936372
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52114) - you deserved it (9183)

On 10/28/2013 at 12:51am - intimacy - by snowwhite (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was talking dirty to my long-distance lover while touching myself, when a cockroach fell from my ceiling and landed on the hand I was molesting myself with. FML

#20915065
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48113) - you deserved it (16219)

On 10/10/2013 at 11:40am - intimacy - by DisgustinglyFrustrated - Argentina (Santa Fe)

Today, my mom made fun of me because I'm 16 and have never had a boyfriend, then bragged that at my age she was already pregnant with me. FML

#20918137
236 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55482) - you deserved it (3225)

On 10/12/2013 at 9:59pm - misc - by roundtherose - United States (Alaska)

Today, I went to school without any makeup on. The guys who usually compliment me for being pretty are now calling me "The Greatest Illusion Ever". FML

#20936906
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43356) - you deserved it (19258)

On 10/28/2013 at 4:31pm - misc - by The greatest Illusion ever (woman) - United States

Today, my otherwise lovely boyfriend of a month showed his true colors. He freaked out when he learned that I use tampons instead of pads. He yelled that using them is like cheating on him, because his penis is the only thing that should ever enter me. FML

#20925494
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53520) - you deserved it (5073)

On 10/18/2013 at 7:01pm - love - by O-|---<=~ (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was assigned to fill in for a French teacher who was out sick. I had asked the class to name some French-speaking countries. I called on one girl and she replied, "Uh, Europe. That's, like, the only other one, right?" Nobody disagreed. I'm filling in for the rest of the month. FML

#20929522
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40930) - you deserved it (2584)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:40pm - work - by :| - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mother posted a video of me giving birth, on Facebook. FML

#20974447
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54920) - you deserved it (4025)

On 11/29/2013 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, in the small hours of the morning, my roommate's boyfriend kicked his foot through the thin wall separating our bedrooms during sex. They didn't even stop. FML

#20956290
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47476) - you deserved it (3841)

On 11/13/2013 at 1:08pm - intimacy - by BreakingTheMood (woman) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, my neighbor put up an electric fence to keep my five-year-old son out. FML

#20980679
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36718) - you deserved it (12456)

On 12/04/2013 at 5:29pm - kids - by Awkward - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to have sex. To set the mood, she suggested we watch a porno she once starred in. FML

#20963410
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55568) - you deserved it (8448)

On 11/19/2013 at 2:46pm - intimacy - by oops999 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend got on one knee and started talking about how we met. Knowing what was coming, I started tearing up, absolutely sure he was going to propose. Just as I was about to say yes, he quickly stood up and yelled "HAH, JUST KIDDING". FML

#20967193
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59715) - you deserved it (5537)

On 11/22/2013 at 7:16pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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