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Today, I made my brother go to the grocery store to get some frozen pizzas. Ten minutes after he left, the power cut out. Still no power. Still hungry. FML

#19495947
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20795) - you deserved it (3764)

On 04/19/2012 at 2:45pm - misc - by noooo!!! - United States

Today, I went to move a load of laundry out of the washer and into the dryer, but the clothes were already in the dryer. Normally, I would be happy about this. However, I am currently living alone. FML

#21511987
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20795) - you deserved it (1869)

On 01/05/2016 at 11:48pm - misc - by Pithegreat (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend declared he doesn't feel ready to move in with me for at least "some more years". We have already been together for five years. When he bought an apartment one year ago, he kept it a secret for three months. Maybe I should learn to take a hint. Or several hints. FML

#21487911
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20793) - you deserved it (4265)

On 11/03/2015 at 2:10pm - love - by Unwanted (woman) - Austria

Today, I met a hot guy at a club and we really hit it off. We went back to his place and we got down to business. After, I noticed he had an iPod Touch on his nightstand. I complimented him on it and he responded with, "Yeah, my girlfriend gave it to me as an anniversary present." FML

#4360788
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20790) - you deserved it (54712)

On 08/07/2009 at 1:09pm - love - by accidentalslut (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was starting to get freaky with my boyfriend when his dad came in with no warning to let the dog into my boyfriend's bedroom. His dad noticed what was going on and covered the dog's eyes instead of just leaving. FML

#21517614
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20793) - you deserved it (3274)

On 01/20/2016 at 11:41pm - intimacy - by Garfield - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I learned that if I take my full dosage of Vicodin, I will throw up all day. I also learned that if I don't take my full dosage of Vicodin, I will be in excruciating pain all day. FML

#21495944
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20790) - you deserved it (1414)

On 11/23/2015 at 4:21pm - health - by owch (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend is so ashamed of me that when someone asked how far along my pregnancy is, he quickly replied "5 months now!" instead of telling them I'm not actually pregnant. FML

#21457890
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20789) - you deserved it (11007)

On 08/19/2015 at 1:15am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, a customer scared me for the sole purpose of watching my breasts jiggle when I jumped in surprise. I know because his head moved as they did, and he said, "Nice." before walking away. FML

#21519950
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20788) - you deserved it (1921)

On 01/27/2016 at 2:59am - work - by NotYourToy (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while getting it on with my wife, I started to talk dirty to her. She started laughing. When I asked her if she wanted me to stop, she just kept on laughing. FML

#8993130
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20787) - you deserved it (4552)

On 03/11/2010 at 7:50am - intimacy - by StretchNuts - United States

Today, I got up at five, got dressed, and walked halfway to work in the snow. I then realized that it's Sunday. I also forgot my keys. FML

#1426
15 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20785) - you deserved it (5670)

On 01/17/2009 at 6:11am - work - by Bitch its me - Korea Republic of (Kyonggi-do)

Today, after being told numerous times how sexist the East Coast is, I went ahead with my East Coast grad school architecture interview. The first thing out of the interviewer's mouth was, "Are you sure you don't want to do interior architecture?" FML

#21522710
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20786) - you deserved it (2637)

On 02/04/2016 at 9:13am - work - by LL (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to pick up some pictures I took on a family trip, but the person at the counter said someone else had already picked them up. Now not only am I out $20, some random creep has pictures of me and my whole family. FML

#21499279
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20783) - you deserved it (1391)

On 12/02/2015 at 10:02am - misc - by countrygirl8846 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I discovered that spicy ground beef bits are the perfect size to become lodged in one's nasal cavity when vomited back up. FML



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