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Today, I was in a car accident. After screaming at the woman for running into me, I got in my car and drove off. As I was driving away, I was staring her down when I ended up rear ending the person in front of me. FML

#19361
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6237) - you deserved it (48285)

On 02/09/2009 at 11:54pm - misc - by prettyinpurple - United States (Virginia)

Today, I woke up at 7 am to take my last final. When I got to the parking lot, I realized my car was missing. After speaking to the police for 3 hours, I called my girlfriend to let her know what happened. She then told me I had parked on the street the night before. So much for the 8 am final. FML

#6689873
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6234) - you deserved it (25548)

On 12/10/2009 at 1:34am - misc - by nofinal (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I took a shower at my girlfriend's apartment. I was wandering around, gathering my clothes when I noticed my girl doing her hair in the other room. She looked sort of peculiar, so I stood there, studying her. Half naked. I then realized it wasn't my girlfriend, but her roommate. FML

#6129909
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6230) - you deserved it (18430)

On 11/03/2009 at 12:20am - intimacy - by HadToApologize (woman) - United States (California)

Today, and for the last two weeks I have been preparing my girlfriend for a break up with nasty remarks. She has been finding me exceptionally funny. FML

#548
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6225) - you deserved it (33077)

On 12/18/2008 at 11:11pm - love - by Olive - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up on a friend's floor with a massive hangover after her party last night. My friend, who was next to me, barfed all over me. She then told me that while I was drunk last night, I made out with her dog as well as two of our other friend's boyfriends. FML

#8862366
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6224) - you deserved it (35110)

On 03/06/2010 at 2:38am - animals - by drunk (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, while trying to get my phone to charge, I shoved in the cable harder and harder and tried to wobble it so my phone would charge. After snapping the USB input from the force, I saw the plug was switched off. FML

#18106914
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6219) - you deserved it (38244)

On 10/29/2011 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Poole)

Today, I accused my son of faking being sick. He then blew chunks all over me. FML

#19318105
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6215) - you deserved it (46179)

On 03/21/2012 at 12:06am - kids - by George Saunders - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, while on the roof of my friend's house, I took a shortcut down by jumping onto the roof of his nearby shed. Not only did I go right through it and hurt my arm, I've also received several calls from my friend's dad, demanding I pay for the damage. FML

#17464270
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6213) - you deserved it (47462)

On 08/13/2011 at 10:41pm - health - by IronFoot - Canada

Today, I went to orientation for college. They gave us a name tag and I tried to figure out how to put it on for a few minutes. After struggling with it I realized it was a sticker. FML

#19665526
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6212) - you deserved it (25244)

On 05/22/2012 at 11:27pm - work - by CollegeKID - United States

Today, after a week of looking for my car keys and being forced to drag my family around on public transportation, my wife found the keys in our car's ignition. FML

#20142914
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6210) - you deserved it (27087)

On 11/01/2012 at 1:09pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Philippines (Manila)

Today, after I had filled up my car and got into it I saw a cute guy running towards me. I flashed a smile and left the door open and said "hey" when he was next to me. He said, "the pump is still attached to your car, you really should be more careful." FML

#119567
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6208) - you deserved it (40382)

On 02/23/2009 at 11:29pm - misc - by sillyrabbit (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I realized just how much of a bitch I am when I grounded my son for not telling me what he got me for my birthday. FML

#19861407
272 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6202) - you deserved it (80395)

On 06/28/2012 at 4:29pm - kids - by MeanMother - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was in the car with my cousin and we saw a family of three. They where all really fat and the lady was holding 2 boxes of pizza. I decided to roll down the window and scream "fatasses" as loud as I could while my cousin drove off. They were going to the same house we were. FML

#7732891
397 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6196) - you deserved it (82779)

On 01/31/2010 at 2:03am - misc - by lauris1306 - Canada (Ontario)



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