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Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML

#15162100
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13476) - you deserved it (40739)

On 03/01/2011 at 11:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was eating some left over Easter peanut MandMs at work, when I exclaimed "oh cool, they have E's on them for Easter". It took me a couple of minutes, but I eventually realized that I was looking at a regular MandM sideways. Definitely explains my coworkers' uncontrollable laughter. FML

#1023184
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13470) - you deserved it (71268)

On 04/16/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by StewPit (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I showed off my new tattoo to my friends. Too bad it says "Walk Earless" now instead of "Walk Fearless." That's right, I'm now supporting Van Gogh. FML

#18997714
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13461) - you deserved it (27840)

On 02/05/2012 at 12:54am - misc - by inked - United States (Alabama)

Today, I got a job selling knives. I had training for 11 hours. At the end of the training session, the instructor promptly informed everyone that they had to pay $145 for a set of demo knives. I paid the $145. I went home and learned that it was a scam. I went back for a refund. They said no. FML

#3446185
422 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13460) - you deserved it (50045)

On 07/03/2009 at 2:19am - work - by Regina (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was in my room and I drew a Harry Potter lightning bolt on my forehead in eyeliner because it cheers me up. Then some friends came over, so we went out to get yogurt, and when I got back I realized the lightning bolt was still there. I'm in college. FML

#150971
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13458) - you deserved it (70774)

On 02/27/2009 at 3:57am - misc - by Fenny (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I thought my online boyfriend was calling me, so the first line I said was "Hey, Baby." His wife answered with, "This is Jenny. Who's this?" After speaking for thirty minutes, I found out he's married, fifty-eight, and has two kids. I'm seventeen. FML

#6352873
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13453) - you deserved it (65095)

On 11/18/2009 at 10:09am - misc - by omgitserika - United States (California)

Today, I told my boyfriend to stop tickling me, since I absolutely hate being tickled. He got extremely pissed at me and left the room. It took me a full five minutes to realize that I'd called him by my ex's name. FML

#17184494
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13454) - you deserved it (71360)

On 07/20/2011 at 12:07am - love - by sarahbeth93 - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I was talking to my guy friend on the phone. He said, "You sound depressed, I should cheer you up and give you a big hug." Jokingly, I responded, "You wouldn't hug something as gross as me." His response? "You'd be surprised." FML

#4174665
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13444) - you deserved it (40011)

On 07/31/2009 at 2:44am - misc - by Girafarig (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I asked to borrow my fat friend's pants for a semi-formal activity tomorrow. I figured I'd just get a belt to hold the pants up. Turns out, the pants fit me. FML

#76555
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13444) - you deserved it (55997)

On 02/19/2009 at 7:18am - health - by Machine (man) - Japan (Okinawa)

Today, my friend sent me an online money transfer. After forgetting the password and locking myself out of my account, I had to phone up the bank and have it reset. I was prompted to answer the security question, which was "What, what?" I had to say "In the butt." to get my money. FML

#16661334
270 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13443) - you deserved it (59653)

On 06/14/2011 at 1:57pm - money - by notinthebutt (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house to meet his parents. After hundreds passive aggressive comments, my boyfriend and I went into the kitchen. I started complaining to him about how his parents were horrible and mean. Little did I know, his parents had followed us in and were right behind me. FML

#4974765
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13442) - you deserved it (43473)

On 09/01/2009 at 11:18am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, while in the shower with my girlfriend she was going on and on about how she thinks she's fat when she's in perfect shape. With what she said still on my mind, I meant to say "honey, you're so beautiful", but accidentally said "honey, you're so fat". I'll be sleeping alone tonight. FML

#7460932
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13442) - you deserved it (30155)

On 01/20/2010 at 7:23pm - love - by showerpower (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, my boss fired me for being on Facebook at work. He did it via a wall post on Facebook saying, "ur fired." Six of my friends liked this. FML

#13997572
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13443) - you deserved it (33134)

On 11/27/2010 at 7:36am - misc - by Flaps - United States (New York)



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