Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my mom bought me some expensive Japanese candy. I opened it, and saw that each chewy candy was wrapped in a thin, hard to peel off wrapper. After trying to get each wrapper off, I determined they were unopen-able and threw them away. I then read the box, saying the wrappers were edible. FML

#10645827
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6143) - you deserved it (48191)

On 05/20/2010 at 8:37am - misc - by Candy - United States (Maryland)

Today, my older brother and I were teasing our mom about her age. When we jokingly told her it was hard for us to watch our parents get old, she responded by saying "yeah, well, it's hard for me to watch my kids grow up and not have anyone who wants to marry them". FML

#7451300
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6142) - you deserved it (37674)

On 01/20/2010 at 1:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting it on in a water park changing stall. A woman and a security guard barged in and angrily told us that there were children around. We were escorted out of the park wearing nothing but our swimsuits. FML

#19221351
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6142) - you deserved it (60534)

On 03/05/2012 at 3:35pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, while parking, I accidentally hit my landlord's daughter's brand new car. I made a huge dent in the side door. I thought nobody was home, so I quickly went to my room. Turns out they were having a barbecue outside and saw the whole thing. FML

#18119060
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6133) - you deserved it (42606)

On 10/31/2011 at 4:30am - misc - by j3r3zana16 (woman) - Canada

Today, my mom was gifted with a toiletry basket. I grabbed the lotion and used it without asking. When I went out, it began raining hard. I got wet and noticed my skin got very sticky. Turns out the lotion was actually body wash. People were wondering why soap bubbles were coming from my skin. FML

#4499935
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6129) - you deserved it (53252)

On 08/13/2009 at 12:07pm - misc - by soapgirl (woman) - Philippines (Pampanga)

Today, I learned that if you make fun of a man for walking with a cane, you'd better be ready for him to hit you with it. FML

#5912025
221 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6129) - you deserved it (140118)

On 10/20/2009 at 12:05pm - misc - by stick (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was reading a magazine while straightening my hair. I got really into this one article until suddenly a huge clump of hair fell on it. I looked up and realized I had burned through the layer of hair I was straightening, leaving me with one layer at ear length and the rest at bra length. FML

#10512459
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6128) - you deserved it (30532)

On 05/13/2010 at 7:31pm - misc - by errints234234 (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I lost a huge bet with my friends. I had to either post a sexual message on my mom's Facebook wall confessing my "love" for her, or be ratted out for cheating on a school test earlier in the year. Now I'm considered a freak by half my school, and am indefinitely grounded. FML

#18368736
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6127) - you deserved it (34424)

On 11/27/2011 at 6:16pm - misc - by honor sucks (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I thought it would be fun to drive into a stack of some empty cardboard boxes on my street. They weren't empty. FML

#14942524
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6125) - you deserved it (48277)

On 02/11/2011 at 11:06pm - money - by 2dumb2drive - United States

Today, I tried opening a can for the first time using a manual can opener. I tried for a half hour to open a can of ravioli, mutilating the can in the process. Only after watching five Youtube videos on how to use a manual can opener did I notice the pull-tab on the top of the ravioli can. FML

#13789664
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6112) - you deserved it (54567)

On 11/10/2010 at 12:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I realized that if you are too lazy to get completely dressed in the morning and only put on a top, you should not answer a Skype video call from your boss that involves you standing up, turning around and grabbing files from your filing cabinet all in clear view of your web cam. FML

#6264237
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6112) - you deserved it (33582)

On 11/11/2009 at 8:54pm - work - by julie (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, after spending about 5 grand on my home studio over the past year, I realized I have no musical talent whatsoever. FML

#19660967
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6110) - you deserved it (29685)

On 05/22/2012 at 3:34am - misc - by gaga - United States (California)

Today, I gave my son a row for losing a very important paper that I need for my work. I've just found it in my right pocket. FML

#267
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6109) - you deserved it (49982)

On 11/10/2008 at 7:06am - kids - by Daddy - Sent from mobile version



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: