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Today, I got more happy birthday wishes on my porn account than my Facebook. FML

Today, I woke up to a text from my boyfriend asking if I'd Skype with him. Thinking he'd find my tousled bed hair and big t-shirt sexy, I went on. The first thing he noticed was the massive booger on my face that stretched from my nose to the other side of my cheek. FML

#15015592
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11240) - you deserved it (32864)

On 02/17/2011 at 12:29pm - misc - by Whatever479 - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I was in my psychology class taking the hardest test ever. After I spent most of the period trying to fill in the few answers that I knew, I looked up to see everyone with their notebooks on their desks. It was an open-note test. FML

#5335783
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11234) - you deserved it (52116)

On 09/18/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I send a text message to my ex-boyfriend, who dumped me four months ago, telling him to come back. His answer: "feeling-wise I won't come back to you, but sexually, why not". FML

#602
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11232) - you deserved it (23096)

On 12/26/2008 at 2:53am - intimacy - by Laloose - Sent from mobile version

Today, it was my mother's birthday. My 5 year old brother and 85 year old grandma decided to decorate the house with balloons and a blow up "people" they found in my room. FML

#5464922
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11233) - you deserved it (41687)

On 09/25/2009 at 11:24am - misc - by Needasafe1234 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I have to go on a diet, because I can't afford to buy bigger clothes. FML

#18768991
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11231) - you deserved it (33468)

On 01/10/2012 at 7:37pm - money - by Voltron - United States

Today, I was fixing some photos for a client. I spent 20 minutes trying to Photoshop an unusual black dot out of a picture. Only then did I discover it was a black dot on my computer screen. FML

#1118521
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11230) - you deserved it (59139)

On 04/19/2009 at 2:09pm - misc - by confusedphotographer (woman) - United States (Kentucky)

Today, I went to see the "Cirque du Soleil" at the Albert Hall. It was amazing, apparently. Of course I wouldn't know, because I left my glasses at the hotel, and was sitting at the very back row. FML

#14754857
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11228) - you deserved it (26365)

On 01/29/2011 at 6:43am - misc - by blind (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, I was stood up by a blind date. After calling and texting her about being a horrible person, she called me from the hospital. She was in a car accident. FML

#16439169
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11227) - you deserved it (54890)

On 05/31/2011 at 6:35pm - love - by bfall74 - Canada

Today, I went camping and shared a tent with this girl I have been sleeping with here and there for a year. To impress her, I popped a certain male enhancement supplement. Thirty minutes later I found out she was on her period. What a long night. FML

#18300773
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11225) - you deserved it (40562)

On 11/20/2011 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by johnnydoe6969 - United States

Today, I spent 3 hours washing my hands to get the pony out of the soap bar. I'm 16. FML

#3297197
247 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11225) - you deserved it (50192)

On 06/28/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Soapy (woman) - United States (New Mexico)

Today, it was the hottest day of the year so I opened my sun roof. The hottest day of the year was followed by the biggest storm of the year. I forgot to close my sun roof and my car is now flooded. FML

#10815057
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11222) - you deserved it (27993)

On 05/28/2010 at 2:20am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was first in line at a stoplight. After five minutes, with a line of cars behind me, the light was still red. People behind me started honking, so I decided to just go. Halfway across the way, I was greeted by a camera flash. Nobody else went. FML

#5270007
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11220) - you deserved it (48620)

On 09/15/2009 at 8:16am - misc - by publicenemy (man) - United States (California)



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