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Today, my friend mentioned a book that reminded her of me, when I asked what it was called she said "He's just not that into you". FML

#2931
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18491) - you deserved it (1859)

On 01/27/2009 at 7:17pm - love - by Oh really - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I overheard my husband telling my step-dad that I have the same ability to sniff out chocolate in a house as a certain animal has to find truffles in the woods. FML

#14294179
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18488) - you deserved it (5840)

On 12/22/2010 at 3:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, what started as my mom calling my grandma for a recipe turned into them discussing the philosophical reason behind my baking. I apparently picked up baking because I'm depressed over unemployment. And here I thought I just liked the smell of baked goods. FML

#19892549
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18488) - you deserved it (1684)

On 07/04/2012 at 9:48pm - misc - by Shortcake (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was debating if I actually do talk to myself. I was having this conversation with myself. FML

#19236548
95 comments

Today, I told my daughter that she should put some love into her cooking. She started kissing the ingredients. FML

#19305380
7 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18486) - you deserved it (12804)

On 03/19/2012 at 12:59am - kids - by FoodyFood (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, my husband staggered home after a night of drinking. He was too intoxicated to find the toilet so he started to pee in the cat's litter box. Apparently, he was invading her territory and she attacked him. His scream as she bit and scratched him must have woken the whole world. FML

#19873141
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18486) - you deserved it (2128)

On 06/30/2012 at 9:00pm - misc - by pissed off -

Today, I invited a girl I really like to spend the afternoon at my place. Everything went great... with my sister. They became really good friends, and me, well, I tried to alleviate my boredom in front of my computer. FML

#717
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18482) - you deserved it (2209)

On 01/06/2009 at 4:51am - love - by [SiMON] - Sent from mobile version

Today, my 5-year-old, overweight Siberian Husky tackled me because he thought that my lipstick was food. FML

#20091999
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18479) - you deserved it (5836)

On 09/28/2012 at 6:53am - animals - by emilyhendrix0414 - United States

Today, I realized for the last year that my husband has been home from Iraq, I haven't gotten more than a few hours of sleep at night. Not because he gets nightmares, but because he now snores so loud that the pets sleep at the other end of the house to get rest. FML

#8190091
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18476) - you deserved it (2715)

On 02/13/2010 at 12:23am - misc - by xetsa - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was proud when I started a confrontation with my best friend's brother because he is a sexist pig who treats women like crap. Six hours later my pride was gone: I made him an after-sex sandwich. FML

#20975509
100 comments

Today, I was talking on my mobile and walking into a grocery store saying, quite loudly, "Time heals all wounds!" right as I passed a woman with significant burns covering her face. I guess I was wrong. FML

#989435
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18476) - you deserved it (48898)

On 04/15/2009 at 12:17pm - misc - by Insensitive (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was mugged at gunpoint by a senior citizen. She now has a lousy $20, and I probably have PTSD. FML

#20182765
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18474) - you deserved it (2165)

On 11/28/2012 at 4:16pm - misc - by stillshakinggd (man) - United States



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