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Today, I'm being evicted from my apartment for not paying rent. My father is the on-site landlord. Meaning I now have to move my stuff downstairs into his place and hear every day how I'm a failure. FML

#4971137
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13191) - you deserved it (40631)

On 09/01/2009 at 3:30am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, it was my high school graduation. I brought my camera to capture these last memories, only to discover that the batteries were dead. When I got home and went to change them, I realized they were not dead, they were just put in the wrong way. FML

#2556811
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13189) - you deserved it (51154)

On 06/03/2009 at 1:22am - misc - by keifer13 (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, we got our results for our final grade English paper on which I worked my butt off on, and also which I let my best-friend copy off from. I received a E- and two detentions for plagiarism. My friend got a A minus. All she said was "oh well, at least you tried your best". FML

#6225217
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13189) - you deserved it (47476)

On 11/09/2009 at 5:27am - misc - by fuck_thisshit (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML

#18915455
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13186) - you deserved it (28340)

On 01/26/2012 at 11:45am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13182) - you deserved it (41429)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

Today, my band went to play a set for the first time. I'm the drummer. All was going well, and then before our first song I threw the sticks in the air, went to catch them, and one hit me right in the eye. I couldn't continue playing. Now I have to wear an eyepatch. FML

#2560457
266 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13179) - you deserved it (53426)

On 06/03/2009 at 6:06am - work - by failedmusician (woman) - New Zealand (Wellington)

Today, my 3 year old son's tricycle was stolen. I looked up the street and saw a neighbour's kid riding it. I marched up, gently lifted him off it, gave him a stern lecture about stealing and brought the tricycle back home. The cops then showed up. Apparently, the kid has an identical tricycle. FML

#17481344
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13169) - you deserved it (34789)

On 08/15/2011 at 3:14pm - kids - by ollie179 - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I showed my aunt and mother my tattoo. They both burst out laughing. FML

#20562807
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13162) - you deserved it (31167)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:17pm - misc - by anon - Netherlands (Limburg)

Today, I put lemon juice in my hair as a cheap and easy way to get highlights. I left it in my hair and I laid out in the backyard to get some sun. The sunshine wasn't the only thing that found me; it seems every bug in the neighborhood is now hiding in my hair. FML

#16580988
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13161) - you deserved it (46101)

On 06/09/2011 at 4:32pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I went to an orchestra concert. Halfway through the performance I had to fart really bad, so I decided to try and sneak it in while the orchestra was playing a loud exciting part. Just as I let it rip, there was a dramatic pause in the music. Everyone heard. FML

#19917515
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13160) - you deserved it (24691)

On 07/10/2012 at 12:44am - misc - by Concert Flatulent - United States (Texas)

Today, I handed the keys to my Mustang to my mom so she could go car shopping. As she pulled away, I remembered the condom wrappers, sex toy packaging, and empty bottle of rum that was in the passenger's seat of my car. I'm twenty. FML

#945659
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13157) - you deserved it (75765)

On 04/13/2009 at 6:46am - intimacy - by jackass (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, McDonalds charged me 21 cents for a honey mustard packet. The jerk manager made me break a $50 bill. So I grabbed all their napkins, carried them into the parking lot and tossed them all into the air in protest and drove off. Down the road, I realized I left my wallet at the counter. FML

#3117856
326 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13155) - you deserved it (75494)

On 06/22/2009 at 12:18pm - misc - by Jesse (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that if you whistle Christmas carols while shitting in a public bathroom, a little boy might just look under the stall to see if Santa is pooping. FML

#19784207
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13151) - you deserved it (23577)

On 06/13/2012 at 9:17pm - misc - by ww2freak - United States (Virginia)



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