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Today, I wore my kilt to the university I attend. Getting tired of the stares which I was receiving, I yelled "It's cause its too big to fit in my pants". As soon as the words left my mouth, a gust of wind came and blew my kilt up around my waist, revealing that my previous claim was untrue. FML

#6053376
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9605) - you deserved it (50350)

On 10/29/2009 at 10:31am - misc - by TrueScotsman (man) - United States (Alabama)

Today, whilst sat next to a old lady on a flight back to the UK, I exclaimed how I wished somebody would gag the crying baby a few rows behind us. Her reply was, "That's my grandson." FML

#12973891
211 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9604) - you deserved it (34120)

On 09/09/2010 at 6:01am - misc - by myles bevan - United Kingdom

Today, I had to change my mobile number because I was getting abused by a guy, so I sent my new number to all of the people on my contact list. Including him. FML

#18982881
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9603) - you deserved it (44222)

On 02/03/2012 at 7:48am - misc - by Jodie - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I discovered my boyfriend is incredibly ticklish on the bottom of his feet. Trying to be a bit flirty, I slowly slid two fingers down his calf and mockingly tickled his feet. He reacted by inadvertently elbowing me in the nose, nearly breaking it. FML

#16128165
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9602) - you deserved it (38225)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:10am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia

Today, a girl I've had a huge crush on for a long time told another friend of ours to get a life. I, in my infinite genius responded that her mom needed to get a life. She ran out of the room bawling. I got slapped in the face and informed that her mom had died not long ago. FML

#4336
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9601) - you deserved it (32643)

On 02/01/2009 at 12:22am - misc - by Huge A Hole - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was in an elevator with my family and a family I didn't know. I was about to press the number when somebody came up behind me. I thought it was my brother trying to press the number first, so I aggressivly pushed him out of the way. Turns out it was the other family's ten year old son. FML

#1312946
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9601) - you deserved it (54949)

On 04/25/2009 at 2:52am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I wasn't feeling too well. I decided to bring my laptop with me to the bathroom, because I figured I would be in there for a while. Things were going great, until I felt a burp coming. Next thing I know, my computer is covered with puke. FML

#6311289
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9601) - you deserved it (33576)

On 11/15/2009 at 10:45am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, while looking through the camera my boyfriend got me, I found a video of a girl giving him head. After screaming at him about it and breaking up with him, I realized the girl was a drunken me. FML

#20119129
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9600) - you deserved it (59137)

On 10/16/2012 at 1:23am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I chipped a tooth trying to solve a Rubik's Cube. FML

#18343530
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9599) - you deserved it (25405)

On 11/25/2011 at 1:27am - health - by yollew - United States (Oregon)

Today, I spent about 10 minutes searching frantically for my cell phone, while holding it up to my ear and talking to my friend about my plans tonight. FML

#17934775
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9597) - you deserved it (37245)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:54am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was walking to work through a bad part of town. A man yelled something at me, but knowing what part of town I was in, I ignored him and kept walking. Two seconds later I got hit by a car. Turns out, he was trying to warn me about the car coming right towards me. FML

Today, my partner and I were informed by the man we had a three-way with, the first one after having finally screwed up the courage to do it, that he has mono. I don't feel so good. FML

#1345
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9594) - you deserved it (32932)

On 01/16/2009 at 8:36am - intimacy - by fd - United States (Alabama)

Today, I was walking to my car tonight when I saw a large man walking behind me, I hurried to open my car as he was approaching quickly, my door wasn't unlocking and I panicked. It was then I noticed it wasnt even my car. As I walked away from the other car, he walked up and unlocked the door. FML

#202745
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9594) - you deserved it (43298)

On 03/03/2009 at 11:19pm - misc - by Fantastic (woman) - United States (California)



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