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Today, I invited a girl I really like to spend the afternoon at my place. Everything went great... with my sister. They became really good friends, and me, well, I tried to alleviate my boredom in front of my computer. FML

#717
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21405) - you deserved it (2554)

On 01/06/2009 at 4:51am - love - by [SiMON] - Sent from mobile version

Today, I picked up my daughter from preschool. Her teacher handed me her nap blankets and mentioned there was an extra article of clothing I might want to take home. I looked in-between the blankets and saw a pair of my giant granny panties that had gotten mixed in with her stuff. FML

#19462191
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21404) - you deserved it (4352)

On 04/13/2012 at 5:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, after doing inventory at my job, I was approached by a co-worker who I had always thought was cute. I tried talking to her, but it was hard as I kept trembling and stuttering from spending two hours in a meat locker. Now she assumes that I'm "special". FML

#20186264
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21400) - you deserved it (2248)

On 12/01/2012 at 3:35am - work - by CheddarJack89 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went on a first date with my crush. Right before the date, I noticed a monstrous pimple in the middle of my forehead. I covered it with make-up, but it was still visible. The guy spent the whole evening laughing at me and telling me that I look like an unicorn. FML

#21460569
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21389) - you deserved it (1768)

On 08/25/2015 at 3:46pm - love - by NocturnalFox (woman) - Czech Republic (Plzensky kraj)

Today, I bought my first iPhone. Today, I broke my first iPhone. FML

#19484468
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21387) - you deserved it (24146)

On 04/17/2012 at 3:23pm - misc - by phoneless - Jordan

Today, my dog managed to pull a one-pound package of raw bacon out and eat the entire package including the cardboard. The vets cheered when they finally got him to puke up the entire, unchewed package of bacon. FML

Today, I'm too sunburned to masturbate. Now I have nothing to do. FML

#16432194
268 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21378) - you deserved it (65493)

On 05/31/2011 at 7:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I had to explain to a patient that no, her nipples were not slowly getting smaller. FML

#17958269
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21378) - you deserved it (2145)

On 10/11/2011 at 5:43am - work - by Anony-moose (woman) - United States

Today, I was giving a tour of my boat to a man who seemed interested in purchasing it. Everything was going great. That is, until, the motor stopped running in the middle of the ocean. FML

#20047299
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21376) - you deserved it (2578)

On 08/29/2012 at 12:52am - money - by anon - United States (Maine)

Today, I took my daughter to the zoo, because she loves tigers. Correction: she used to love tigers, until one sprayed urine on her from a distance of four meters. FML

#21458732
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21376) - you deserved it (5042)

On 08/21/2015 at 1:55am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I realised that my staff doesn't take me seriously. I walked in on my chef, who had just spent an hour and half a block of cheese carving cheddar goggles for himself. When I confronted him, he pulled up his t-shirt to reveal a cocktail sausage taped to his stomach. FML

#8819717
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21375) - you deserved it (5399)

On 03/04/2010 at 7:43am - work - by Garry (man) - United Kingdom (Bath and North East Somerset)

Today, it was the last day of school, and I said goodbye to one of my students. She then told me how to correctly pronounce her name. I'd said it wrong all year. FML

#19741158
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21375) - you deserved it (11921)

On 06/05/2012 at 10:21pm - work - by Mark - United States

Today, I had an important interview. On the way there, I stopped in front of a car window to look at my reflection, checking I didn't have salad stuck between my teeth. Having pulled several faces, I realised that there were two girls inside the car, cracking up with laughter. FML

#419
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21371) - you deserved it (11217)

On 11/30/2008 at 5:51am - misc - by Groom - Sent from mobile version



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