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Today, I was drunk at a party and confessed my love for my crush and told her how I felt. According to my friends, I made out with another girl not long after my confession. FML

#20412747
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10726) - you deserved it (44062)

On 12/22/2012 at 12:01am - love - by Stupid Drunk - United States

Today, I started some laundry late at night. Once my clothes were in the washer for about a half hour, I got bored and I decided I would listen to my iPod. After looking for it for another 15 minutes, I remembered where I'd left it; in my jacket... which is now nice and clean. FML

#13469252
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10725) - you deserved it (23005)

On 10/16/2010 at 5:57am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, the girl I dumped three years ago because she wouldn't take my band seriously is now a successful and rich environmental scientist. Meanwhile, I'm still unemployed, living with my parents, and can barely remember how to play a guitar. FML

#20407310
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10724) - you deserved it (73831)

On 12/19/2012 at 10:26am - love - by rightinthekarma (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went into the store where my boyfriend works. I saw him talking to a customer, his back was facing me, so I went up and smacked his butt. Turns out it wasn't him. FML

#11354335
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10721) - you deserved it (49112)

On 06/21/2010 at 10:21am - love - by pizzafreak18 - United States (New York)

Today, my dad woke me up for the second time to get me ready for school. Wanting me to prove I was really awake, he made me sit up. As soon as he left my room, I dozed off and faceplanted my nightstand. FML

#15635738
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10720) - you deserved it (39605)

On 04/04/2011 at 1:36pm - misc - by Username - United States (Kansas)

Today, to enhance our sex life, my boyfriend and I decided to have sex in our local mall's parking lot. The feeling of getting caught is fun and exhilarating. Until you actually get caught. FML

#14845323
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10718) - you deserved it (48628)

On 02/04/2011 at 10:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, when I was shaving , I wanted to see what I looked like with a Hitler 'tache. Since I was shaving anyway I just left that part and figured I'd shave it later. Well I was goose stepping around my room for awhile and then forgot about it. I ran into my girlfriend's parents later that day. FML

#297200
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10712) - you deserved it (69099)

On 03/13/2009 at 1:03am - misc - by Noname (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was walking down the street, when a man behind me tapped me on the shoulder. He gave a $5 bill and said that he thought I had dropped it. Not having the integrity to turn him down, I took it. I spent the next 20 minutes being chased by a crazy hobo who claimed that it was his. FML

#3446462
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10710) - you deserved it (46393)

On 07/03/2009 at 2:29am - love - by pinkrazrgirl247 - United States

Today, I accidentally filled the lemonade machine with margarita mix that already had the tequila mixed in. It was served to three kids before anyone figured it out. FML

#11861261
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10707) - you deserved it (37190)

On 07/13/2010 at 10:10pm - work - by magnolia (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my husband and I were fooling around in the shower. For some reason, I thought it'd be a good idea to grab his man meat and show him how to wash someone at a nursing home. He said he'd never be turned on by a nurse again. I'm a nurse. FML

#20515797
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10707) - you deserved it (36909)

On 02/21/2013 at 12:51am - love - by tomedicalforlove -

Today, my blanket got caught on my nose ring and it took my boyfriend over an hour to get it free. Afterwards, he admitted he was trying not to laugh because it reminded him of a bullfight. FML

#18726895
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10702) - you deserved it (26608)

On 01/06/2012 at 3:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - Mexico (Zacatecas)

Today, I had a big party that left my house really messy. I spent hours cleaning the house until it was spotless. When my parents got home, my dad said "Did you have fun at the party?" and I said, "How'd you know?" and he replied "You hate cleaning and the house was filthy when we left". FML

#3777145
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10701) - you deserved it (48219)

On 07/15/2009 at 3:44pm - misc - by far23 (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, it's been 2 weeks since I lost my virginity and I've already had sex with 3 guys. I think I'm a nympho. FML

#723
11 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10695) - you deserved it (72679)

On 01/07/2009 at 3:16am - intimacy - by sexaddict - Sent from mobile version



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