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Today, while at dinner, I told my boyfriend that I wished he liked sushi. He replied, 'I wish you liked anal.' FML

#13814299
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22150) - you deserved it (40046)

On 11/12/2010 at 11:31am - intimacy - by lisacasabonita (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I smashed a spider with my pencil eraser. Later, I absentmindedly chewed on it while doing my homework. FML

#21282480
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22150) - you deserved it (29665)

On 10/21/2014 at 3:46pm - misc - by GetMeTheDamnBleach (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I realised my dad speaks to me the same way he speaks to my dog when she's done something bad. FML

#13459944
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22146) - you deserved it (3138)

On 10/15/2010 at 3:35pm - animals - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, I found out the animal that was gnawing behind the kitchen wall all night was indeed a wild rat and his entire family. FML

#14120407
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22146) - you deserved it (2440)

On 12/07/2010 at 2:12pm - misc - by rattness (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I happily announced to my parents that I'm pregnant. My dad later handed me a printout containing a list of nearby abortion clinics. FML

#21461568
0 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22143) - you deserved it (1992)

On 08/28/2015 at 1:06am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I discovered a brown recluse spider in my house. Before I could smash it, it escaped under the door. Now I'm freaked out and wearing boots and gloves, clutching at my kittens and waiting for it to appear. My dad laughs everytime he walks past. FML

#20141607
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22142) - you deserved it (4231)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:09pm - animals - by NotSpiderman (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to the doctor's thinking I had a UTI. Turns out I have an STD. FML

#18526714
195 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22142) - you deserved it (37974)

On 12/16/2011 at 9:25am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I am probably the only person in the world who can manage to pull a muscle in their neck while brushing their teeth. FML

#21445738
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22142) - you deserved it (2481)

On 07/22/2015 at 11:18pm - health - by skyllabeauty1234 - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend tried to clean out the fireplace with a vacuum cleaner, she sucked up a bunch of embers which set the vacuum on fire. After a crying for a bit, she went back to finish cleaning up only to find that some embers she dumped in a bucket melted through and set part of the carpet on fire. FML

#645
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22140) - you deserved it (3531)

On 12/31/2008 at 9:53pm - misc - by blck - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I enjoyed a lovely family dinner, but my irritating grandma kept trying to buy my purse off me, and kept picking it up to look at it. When I got home I realized all my cash and cigarettes were gone. FML

#20149150
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22139) - you deserved it (2879)

On 11/05/2012 at 5:11pm - money - by Brooklyn - United States (Oregon)

Today, I got told that I was going to hell for turning down a man that was at least in his 60s. Even after I told him I was married. FML

#21455672
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22144) - you deserved it (1461)

On 08/13/2015 at 5:33pm - love - by hnnhyoo (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at a professional tennis match. The ball was hit extremely hard, resulting in it going into the crowd. And when I say crowd, I mean my face. FML

#21443966
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22136) - you deserved it (1925)

On 07/19/2015 at 10:36am - health - by Ouch - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I learned that my boyfriend waits 'til I am asleep to wack off to porn on the internet. We haven't had sex in months because he doesn't want to. FML

#7158529
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22133) - you deserved it (3520)

On 01/05/2010 at 2:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Kentucky)



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