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Today, my boyfriend came to visit me. He told me he was cheating on me, and that he wanted to break up. I was so angry that as he left, I started screaming at him out of my second story apartment window. I picked up a huge potted plant and shoved it through the window at him. It missed my ex and hit my car. FML

#8646489
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12067) - you deserved it (40847)

On 02/25/2010 at 7:33pm - love - by MUemma (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I sent out a text saying "Smile! You're beautiful and don't let anyone tell you otherwise." to most of my contacts. I got one reply, from my best friend, saying, "Are you fucking stupid?" FML

#19064637
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12067) - you deserved it (32760)

On 02/13/2012 at 11:27am - misc - by dis_bee_leaf (woman) - Canada

Today, moments after leaving early, my boss emails me asking if I'm in the office. After an illegal U-turn, running a stop sign, parking in a visitor spot, and sneaking back to my desk, I find out she was locked out of the building but had since found her keys and let herself back in. FML

#1008
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12068) - you deserved it (8771)

On 01/12/2009 at 3:34pm - work - by Leaving Early Fail - United States (California)

Today, my family and I were visiting an aunt. While helping my aunt to set the table, my sister remarked that from behind I look exactly like her. I reflexively blurted out "well fuck you too". Very awkward silence. FML

#20557009
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12062) - you deserved it (37205)

On 03/23/2013 at 8:38pm - misc - by Kjer (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I was at the mall in a store looking at movie posters. I turned around and suddenly saw a creepy guy smiling at me, holding his arms out wide. I screamed "holy shit!" really loudly, causing everyone to stop and stare at me funny. Then I realized the creepy man was a cardboard cutout. FML

#4981586
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12062) - you deserved it (40542)

On 09/01/2009 at 6:21pm - misc - by becca1417 (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my girlfriend found an enormous rose arrangement in the back seat of my car. The flowers were from my fire chief to his wife. I forgot to deliver them. I now have to replace them since my girlfriend thinks I got them for her. The arrangement cost $225. FML

#14989370
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12061) - you deserved it (38561)

On 02/15/2011 at 10:30am - love - by Dj sMoZ! -

Today, while I was in the break room at work, one of my coworkers walked in on me playing with my animal crackers, complete with animal noises. Now, the entire department won't stop teasing me and calling me Tarzan. FML

#18687343
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12054) - you deserved it (32047)

On 01/02/2012 at 3:55pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was on webcam for the first time with a guy I've been texting for a while. Trying to show off my guitar skills, I lean down to pick it up and fell on my face. FML

#11894871
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12053) - you deserved it (24275)

On 07/15/2010 at 5:17am - misc - by ditsy (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the bank to make a withdrawal in order to celebrate my last day here in Italy with my friends. Apparently I'm overdrawn by 187 dollars so I'm eating nothing but leftover stale crackers to survive until I get free plane food on my way back home. FML

#2993926
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12052) - you deserved it (43084)

On 06/18/2009 at 12:11pm - money - by JP (woman) - Italy (Lombardia)

Today, I parked downtown for a few minutes to pick up a pizza. As I was getting out of my car, a sketchy guy came up and asked me for $5. I told him to get lost and walked away. I walked back to the lot with my pizza and my car was gone. The sketchy guy was a parking attendent. He had my car towed. FML

#1251625
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12048) - you deserved it (63783)

On 04/23/2009 at 9:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to have fun at school. So, we went into the locker room. We were making out for a couple minutes when the door opened. It was the principal, who also happens to be her dad. FML

#7907702
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12040) - you deserved it (35963)

On 02/05/2010 at 3:17pm - love - by topfisherman (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, it's the five year anniversary of the day I broke up with my girlfriend to see other people. I've not had sex a single time since. FML

#20134961
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12038) - you deserved it (56184)

On 10/27/2012 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Cslouth - United States (New York)

Today, I got out of the wrong side of the bed. Into a wall. FML

#6475314
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12035) - you deserved it (25069)

On 11/27/2009 at 5:11am - misc - by Nick (man) - United Kingdom (Essex)



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