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Today, my girlfriend gave me a speech on me "not being manly enough". I started crying. FML

#17762644
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16847) - you deserved it (47119)

On 09/17/2011 at 4:17am - love - by Anonymous - South Africa (Gauteng)

Today, a co-worker gave me a couple of CDs he said he wanted me to listen to. I got excited, thinking that they were playlists he'd made for me. They were self-help tracks. FML

#20104274
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16844) - you deserved it (1958)

On 10/06/2012 at 1:09pm - work - by The Last Cockbender (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, I went on a blind date for coffee. He was smart, good looking, and friendly. While we were talking about our respective families it became abundantly clear that I have heard these stories before. I realized that 6 months earlier I had been dumped by his brother after sleeping with him. FML

Today, I was jacking off casually to a picture of my ex-girlfriend, when all of the sudden, my friend sends me an IM picture of a granny bending over which pops up on my screen. I think my sex life is ruined forever. FML

#539
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16834) - you deserved it (27908)

On 12/17/2008 at 11:32pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, like any other day I struggled to put my boots on, went to pee and noticed my pants were covered in what looked like a green dust. I touched it, sniffed it, and it smelled utterly horrendous. So I took my boots off again only to find that one of my cats had took a dump in one of them. FML

Today, I had to take a serious piss. I started urinating and leaned back slightly on my heels. Somehow I lost my balance and fell backward, hitting my head on the wall behind me and spraying myself and my entire bathroom with my own pee. FML

#2412589
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16827) - you deserved it (41307)

On 05/29/2009 at 8:10pm - misc - by pissingcontest (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I arrived twenty minutes early for my opening shift at work, so I decided to turn on the radio and wait in my nice warm car. I woke up two hours later with twelve missed calls from my boss and a dead car battery. FML

#15646476
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16827) - you deserved it (34042)

On 04/05/2011 at 1:10am - work - by 4themoneh - United States (California)

Today, I'm a medicine student, it's my sixth year, and I have spent the whole day in surgery. No one dared tell me that what I was wearing on my feet was actually supposed to be put over my hair. Which was embarrassing. FML

#949
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16825) - you deserved it (6647)

On 01/10/2009 at 10:52pm - work - by Carrie - France (Languedoc-Roussillon)

Today, some Juggalos mocked me for the way I was dressed. Juggalos giving sartorial advice, really? FML

#19491584
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16822) - you deserved it (3356)

On 04/18/2012 at 7:08pm - misc - by amazed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was forced to listen and politely nod with a smile on my face, as my boss droned on and on, explaining that everything in the universe is slowly getting bigger, aside from him, because he's never felt so short before. FML

#19802218
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16820) - you deserved it (1922)

On 06/17/2012 at 3:38pm - work - by Megan (woman) - United Kingdom (Neath Port Talbot)

Today, I talked to my crush for twenty minutes at Wal-mart. Then I realized I forgot to take off my Weight Watchers meeting nametag. FML

#6242607
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16819) - you deserved it (23259)

On 11/10/2009 at 12:53pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was at the mall and I noticed this guy staring at me from across the food court. He smiled and waved at me so I walked over there and tried to talk to him. He was looking at his girlfriend the whole time. FML

#20138654
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16818) - you deserved it (4258)

On 10/29/2012 at 1:59pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my girlfriend told me how she loves when I kiss her out of the blue. I don't have the heart to admit I only do it so I can get some peace and quiet for a few seconds. FML

#16429286
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16816) - you deserved it (34391)

On 05/31/2011 at 12:51am - love - by romantic84 (man) - Canada (Ontario)



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