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Today, my father-in-law called me an idiot for buying him coffee cake because he can't have caffeine. He refuses to believe that there's as much coffee in coffee cake as there is ham in a hamburger. FML

#19742192
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22002) - you deserved it (2663)

On 06/06/2012 at 1:23am - health - by 635CSi (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was extremely constipated. This is a side effect of the medication I take to alleviate my stomach condition. Due to this same condition I can't eat much roughage. We have no laxatives or stool softeners, and I have been shitting bricks for three days. FML

#14124824
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21998) - you deserved it (3159)

On 12/07/2010 at 9:38pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was driving home from a long day at work fixing people's electronics. When I got home, I got a call from work saying I needed to go back and help a customer with their TV again. When I got there, after an hour of driving, I realized I'd accidentally kicked the power cord out. FML

#17403392
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21997) - you deserved it (5405)

On 08/08/2011 at 1:30am - work - by Dispute (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, and all day, I was forced to listen to one of the kids in my apartment building play their recorder loudly and horribly. She started over whenever she missed a note. I was sick, was getting a migraine from it, and couldn't ask her to stop without her mom yelling at me. FML

#18242720
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21987) - you deserved it (3075)

On 11/13/2011 at 11:46pm - health - by mintypoison (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my ex dropped by to pick up a piece of art he'd left when I threw him out a month ago. While here, he visited the restroom. Tonight, my shampoo smelled like urine. And he called at 11pm to say he'd ''rubbed one out'' on my new boyfriend's toothbrush. FML

#20090730
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21987) - you deserved it (7732)

On 09/27/2012 at 7:37am - misc - by red (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I realized that over the course of this winter, there have been more snow days in Atlanta than days in which I have ever been on a date. FML

#8774355
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21986) - you deserved it (4822)

On 03/02/2010 at 3:04pm - love - by lonelyashell (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boyfriend got a hotel room with a jacuzzi, drinks, and tickets to Six Flags for my birthday. He is currently passed out drunk on the other side of the bed, cursing me out in his sleep. FML

#20031154
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21986) - you deserved it (2343)

On 08/20/2012 at 1:00am - misc - by anon (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was paying for coffee and accidentally touched hands with the girl behind the counter. As I was walking home, I realised that was the closest I've been to getting laid in two years. FML

#5661847
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21984) - you deserved it (4310)

On 10/05/2009 at 1:22pm - intimacy - by swedishguy (man) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I saw an old man struggling with three bags, so I offered to carry them for him. He must not have heard me because when I bent down to take the bags, he thought I was stealing them and punched me in the face. FML

#19820336
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21984) - you deserved it (3612)

On 06/20/2012 at 7:27pm - misc - by punchedhelper (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I got a text from someone I met last night at a bar. We texted all day and planned to meet up later. The whole time I had in my mind who he was, but when we met up it was someone completely different that I didn't remember. I had to sit through the whole date pretending I knew him. FML

Today, I woke up to my drunk great grandfather peeing on my cat and thinking it was absolutely hysterical. This isn't the first time and he just moved in with me for the next six weeks. FML

#19894625
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21981) - you deserved it (2028)

On 07/05/2012 at 9:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me. Apparently my nose hair scares him. FML

#19238495
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21979) - you deserved it (13053)

On 03/08/2012 at 9:30am - love - by hairy (woman) - Serbia

Today, I was at a pet store cuddling an apparently overaggressive chinchilla when it decided to bite me and run out of my hands. It is now nowhere to be found and I have to pay for it. FML

#13886609
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21978) - you deserved it (9219)

On 11/18/2010 at 10:34am - misc - by alltimelove -



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