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Today, my roommate pressed "snooze" on his alarm 14 times. I counted. FML

#20200321
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21251) - you deserved it (2188)

On 12/11/2012 at 10:57am - misc - by roommateprobssss:( - United States

Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend in my dorm room. My roommate came in, despite the signal I had up on the door. She didn't leave. She got on her computer and started playing Solitaire. FML

#5050419
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21250) - you deserved it (4768)

On 09/04/2009 at 10:43pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I walked past a man handing out miniature Bibles on my way to class. He handed me one, commenting "here, you look like you need this." FML

#8842
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21249) - you deserved it (4191)

On 02/04/2009 at 8:18pm - misc - by Michigan (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my extremely loud and nocturnal flatmate phoned me to tell me excitedly that he got an accordion for his birthday. FML

#8994510
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21249) - you deserved it (2363)

On 03/11/2010 at 10:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Hillingdon)

Today, I had to take my husband to the hospital. He and his friends got the bright idea of recording a re-enactment of a scene from Fight Club for a YouTube video. It ended as soon as my husband caught a fist to the gut and started violently puking all over our basement floor. FML

#19782918
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21247) - you deserved it (2243)

On 06/13/2012 at 4:38pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

#2418263
457 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21244) - you deserved it (223513)

On 05/29/2009 at 11:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my mom sent me beautiful candlesticks along with some half burned candles. I thanked her. She told me the candlesticks were a wedding gift to my grandmother 85 years ago. Then she said the candles were used at my grandma's wedding. I had already lit them. FML

#9177145
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21244) - you deserved it (7337)

On 03/18/2010 at 12:46am - misc - by knews - United States (Missouri)

Today, my husband bought me XL pajamas for my birthday. I got really angry, telling him that's obviously not my size. I tried them on just to show him how ridiculous they look. They fit. FML

#21336954
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21243) - you deserved it (36875)

On 01/14/2015 at 12:49pm - love - by middleagednurse - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that a family member found a publisher for his book; his badly written, terribly sourced, historically inaccurate book that insults and misrepresents most world cultures and religions. If this actually makes it to print, I'll never be able to use my maiden name again. FML

#19620851
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21241) - you deserved it (2000)

On 05/14/2012 at 3:37am - misc - by AmatureLitCritic - United States (Oregon)

Today, I spent an hour and a half trying to rid my house of smoke and burnt plastic smell because my little sister didn't know she was supposed to add water in the package of microwaveable mac and cheese. FML

#7235673
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21240) - you deserved it (2880)

On 01/09/2010 at 12:45pm - misc - by Justaddwater - France

Today, my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend bumped into me at McDonald's. I was sitting alone at a table with a big mac, two large fries, a large drink and 1 case of chicken nuggets. FML

#7732342
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21239) - you deserved it (32628)

On 01/31/2010 at 1:44am - love - by tammy999 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my boss insisted that we get in the holiday mood by putting up lights, playing Christmas music, and wearing bells on our uniforms. It's not even Thanksgiving yet and I can't even have a tinkle without full-blown jingling. FML

#18247729
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21239) - you deserved it (2458)

On 11/14/2011 at 4:53pm - work - by unhappyelf - United States

Today, my dad explained to me the "chain of command" for our house. McKinley, Mom, himself, Charlie, then me. McKinley is my two year old daughter and Charlie is the dog. He was dead serious. FML

#13623342
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21237) - you deserved it (5053)

On 10/28/2010 at 2:39am - animals - by katie06 - United States



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