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Today, I purchased a brand new television. Not long after the professional who hung it on my wall left, it came crashing down on my hardwood floor. I'm now left with a busted TV, a tear in my living room wall, and a severely drained bank account. FML

#20125611
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25295) - you deserved it (2683)

On 10/20/2012 at 6:48pm - money - by fuck gangnam style in the anus - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my company is paying more for hors d'oeuvres at one party than I will receive for my entire year long internship. FML

#17579253
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25293) - you deserved it (3275)

On 08/25/2011 at 5:55pm - work - by OfficeSlave (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I visited my doctor upon coming home from University. I found out that I'm severely allergic to our pet bunny, which has resulted in a rash taking over my body. She suggested that we get rid of the bunny. I told my mom. She told me to come home less often. FML

#19481808
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25293) - you deserved it (2976)

On 04/16/2012 at 11:47pm - animals - by booearns (woman) - United States

Today, I bought some beef jerky. As I put the first piece in my mouth, I thought to myself, "Wow, this is tough enough to break a tooth." It was. FML

#19816534
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25293) - you deserved it (3365)

On 06/20/2012 at 1:22am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, I learned that last week, the UPS man gave my package to my neighbor for safekeeping. It was over five-hundred dollars' worth of merchandise. My neighbor left for Canada on Saturday. FML

#20160454
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25291) - you deserved it (1821)

On 11/12/2012 at 1:40pm - money - by siciliano12594 - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend of several years, and father of our one-year-old child, finally proposed. He was making idle conversation from twenty feet away and casually said, "By the way, you wanna get hitched?" This is as romantic as my life will ever get. Yay. FML

#19949789
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25290) - you deserved it (9230)

On 07/17/2012 at 12:20pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I gave my drink to a girl who I got with previously and started to dance with her. She backed off after a few seconds, took my drink and danced with my friend who was standing right next to me. FML

#17489
14 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25289) - you deserved it (5629)

On 02/09/2009 at 1:24pm - misc - by Bliss (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got to listen while my grandma, who has dementia and therefore a poor memory, explained to me why the old man on TV was a sex god. She forgot everything once she said it. I got to listen to her explanation five times over. FML

#18942178
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25289) - you deserved it (2411)

On 01/29/2012 at 11:23am - misc - by scared for life (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got my first job after having spent months looking, and graduating college in the meantime. I got it based on my pre-college qualifications. FML

#17928549
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25287) - you deserved it (3150)

On 10/07/2011 at 3:32pm - work - by jdmarine83 - United States

Today, I saw a stick in my car and picked it up to throw it out the window. The "stick" turned out to have eyes. It was a dead lizard. FML

#21339043
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25287) - you deserved it (9939)

On 01/17/2015 at 5:30pm - animals - by bad luck Bianca - United States (Texas)

Today, the only thing my downstairs neighbor wanted to talk about with me is how she can hear us go to the bathroom. She also claims that she can tell which one of us is going, based on the noise level. FML

#17699997
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25286) - you deserved it (2255)

On 09/08/2011 at 10:07pm - misc - by monochrometea (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my 10 year old brother caught me masturbating and then said "Oh, so that's how you do it!". He then ran to his room and locked the door. I inadvertently taught my little brother how to masturbate. FML

#1308807
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25283) - you deserved it (62733)

On 04/25/2009 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went into hysterics and started crying when my boyfriend pulled out a Tiffany's box at dinner. Then I found out he'd used the old box to make the $15 earrings he bought seem more "special." FML

#19954644
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25284) - you deserved it (13537)

On 07/18/2012 at 1:03pm - love - by NoRingForMe (woman) - United States (Connecticut)



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