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Today, I got a ticket for vandalizing public property. I decided to draw a cat on the street outside my house in sidewalk chalk. I'm 20, and I have to explain to my parents why I'm playing with chalk instead of studying. FML

#14990533
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15626) - you deserved it (22618)

On 02/15/2011 at 2:03pm - animals - by AliRocks (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I saw a man in an army uniform. As a bit of a patriot, I went up to thank him for his service. After about 10 minutes of me going on and on, he started laughing. He wasn't a soldier. FML

#20405129
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15623) - you deserved it (25337)

On 12/18/2012 at 2:48am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I discovered that if you are being mugged, never tell your mugger you are going to call the police because he will come back and steal your phone too. FML

#18183017
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15620) - you deserved it (31337)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:53am - money - by Luke - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got on the train with my bike, leaning it up against the wall. After a while, it began to slide down the wall and wobble, so I dashed out to catch it. As I ran for it, I slipped and crashed into it, knocking it into an old man and busting the rear brake. FML

#19375581
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15619) - you deserved it (4170)

On 03/30/2012 at 10:42am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, after mourning and making my girlfriend cancel her big birthday party, I found out my grandma didn't actually die. FML

#14717553
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15618) - you deserved it (23728)

On 01/26/2011 at 5:31am - health - by WronglySad619 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I came home, turned on my laptop, and turned the TV on mute so I could check my email. My mom came home an hour later, took a look at me on the couch, then the TV, and asked what on earth I was watching. I looked up from my laptop and realized it was porn. FML

#14580215
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15609) - you deserved it (27605)

On 01/14/2011 at 6:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, I baby sat a four-year old kid, because his parents went partying. Once in bed, he yells "I want to go party!!". After 3 or 4 times, I told him to go to sleep. 2 hours later, wet bed. "Told you I want to go potty!!" FML

#170
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15601) - you deserved it (45759)

On 10/31/2008 at 3:06am - kids - by Tara - Sweden (Blekinge Lan)

Today, I started a new job, it was going well until I was asked to stand up and be introduced to a company director. I had a hard on. FML

#7928576
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15601) - you deserved it (4973)

On 02/06/2010 at 4:29am - intimacy - by Bacular (man) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my dad told me I'm no longer allowed to see my boyfriend. Apparently there is a deer camera above my driveway that snaps pictures whenever it senses movement. Too bad I didn't know that when I was giving my boyfriend head in the driveway. FML

#17627685
269 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15600) - you deserved it (53222)

On 08/31/2011 at 3:36am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, I cried harder than I have in years. I was babysitting, and watching Pokémon to pass the time. It was the episode where Ash, Dawn, and Brock on the show went their separate ways, and may never be together again. FML

#14852501
232 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15598) - you deserved it (33226)

On 02/05/2011 at 12:22pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found out my friend has been texting my long distance boyfriend more than I do. When I confronted her about it, she confessed that it was because they had been planning a surprise appearance for me. I've never been surprised before, and I ruined my own surprise. FML

#4517705
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15589) - you deserved it (42197)

On 08/14/2009 at 1:29am - misc - by neverbeensurprised (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was telling my boyfriend about how self conscious I am and how I obsess about my weight. He said, "Don't be ridiculous, you don't need to lose that much weight." FML

#13344865
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15589) - you deserved it (24775)

On 10/06/2010 at 5:59pm - love - by Username - Sent from mobile version



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