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Today, I learned from the noise outside my window that construction workers start their days at 5 AM. FML

#17385440
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23424) - you deserved it (2842)

On 08/06/2011 at 5:28am - health - by LH0026 (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was so tired that I fell asleep on the toilet, and then had to give my boss a valid reason for why I was late. FML

#18181534
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23421) - you deserved it (4855)

On 11/07/2011 at 1:49am - work - by Courtney - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend told me he wants to break up. But not until after our anniversary tomorrow, because he's already gotten dinner reservations for us. FML

#20127937
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23421) - you deserved it (1596)

On 10/22/2012 at 5:01am - love - by reserved - United States (California)

Today, walking to work in a snowstorm since I don't own a car, a man rolled down his window and screamed, "what are you doing you f***ing freak? you stupid b**ch!", while I waited for a green light to cross. FML

#3093
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23420) - you deserved it (2132)

On 01/28/2009 at 2:21pm - work - by likwidsol - United States (New York)

Today, I'm on holiday in Vietnam, and was wearing a new shirt. In a restaurant, the waitress pointed at my shirt and said something I couldn't understand, so I just smiled and nodded my head. She then gave me a weird look and walked away. Turns out there was a huge spider on it. FML

#13339977
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23420) - you deserved it (4269)

On 10/06/2010 at 4:40am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Vietnam

Today, I realized that the full body wax I got two weeks ago that my wife told me would look sexy doesn't just make me look like a completely hairless ten-year-old boy. The ingrown hairs everywhere now make me look like someone with chicken pox. FML

#13443862
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23420) - you deserved it (6746)

On 10/14/2010 at 9:05am - health - by mikey - United States (Michigan)

Today, I'm a recovering alcoholic and drug addict. On new years, my mom called and asked what kind of champagne I want. FML

#771
30 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23419) - you deserved it (3100)

On 01/01/2009 at 10:38am - health - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was waiting for a call from a job I had applied for. When the phone rang, I ran as fast I could up the stairs, falling and slamming my shin on the way. The call? It was a woman asking me, "Hi, do you have time to learn about our lord Jesus Christ?" FML

#19324398
23 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23417) - you deserved it (5190)

On 03/22/2012 at 12:56am - work - by Atheist (man) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was observing a children's class as a part of a training program. The teacher asked me to take one kid to the nurse's office because she wasn't feeling well. As soon as we step outside, I slip and fall down, taking the little girl with me. FML

#21438867
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23416) - you deserved it (2478)

On 07/09/2015 at 2:21am - kids - by future teacher - Paraguay (Central)

Today, I got a new pair of glasses, and was driving home. While waiting at a stop sign, I noticed a homeless guy touching himself. He saw me, smiled and waved, and then continued. So much for my new eyesight. FML

#19771597
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23412) - you deserved it (2333)

On 06/11/2012 at 4:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had my wisdom teeth removed. The sympathetic words from my boyfriend asked if this meant I could open my mouth a bit wider for him now. FML

#9158778
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23411) - you deserved it (5117)

On 03/17/2010 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by smiler (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I started an awesome job with competitive pay. I also found out that the place is closing its doors in June. FML

#13874228
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23408) - you deserved it (2282)

On 11/17/2010 at 5:58am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML

#18098889
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23407) - you deserved it (9982)

On 10/28/2011 at 8:44pm - misc - by ricksterile - United States (Illinois)



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