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Today, I returned from vacation. Because of rain, I spent 3 days sitting in a hotel room, watching a TV with bad reception. I'm now less relaxed that if I'd have just stayed home, because that wouldn't have cost me $500, and my TV has more than 15 channels. So much for my first vacation in 5 years. FML

#13584749
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23321) - you deserved it (4681)

On 10/25/2010 at 12:22am - misc - by not_relaxed (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was cooking something I knew would make a lot of smoke, so I asked my teenage daughter to tape a bag over the smoke detector. She said she did, so I cooked; the alarm went off and firemen came. She hadn't taped over the smoke detector, she'd taped it over the doorbell. FML

#20106895
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23320) - you deserved it (4275)

On 10/08/2012 at 1:31am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my son volunteered to help me cut out coupons. When I got to the register at the store, I noticed he'd cut off all the barcodes. FML

#20446465
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23320) - you deserved it (7214)

On 01/07/2013 at 4:27pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was getting frisky with my fiancée when she started talking about her dead great-grandma. FML

#13415176
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23320) - you deserved it (3155)

On 10/12/2010 at 12:48am - intimacy - by tdiz - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I started my new job, and was introduced to my colleague. She seemed old and quite experienced, so I thought she was going to teach me. I was wrong. It turns out I'm a replacement for her daughter, who used to secretly do all of her work for her because she has no idea how to do it herself. FML

#19992409
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23320) - you deserved it (1561)

On 07/30/2012 at 9:00am - work - by Frustation - United States

Today, after confessing my love for my best friend, he looked at me and said "I'm not feeling it. But does this mean we can have sex?" FML

#7618857
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23318) - you deserved it (3307)

On 01/27/2010 at 7:09pm - intimacy - by Boned...hard - Sent from mobile version

Today, I found out that my boss of 2 years not only doesn't know my name, but calls me "Jew hair" behind my back because of my natural ringlets. This man determines all of my career progression. FML

#21423649
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23316) - you deserved it (1532)

On 06/09/2015 at 11:21pm - work - by hmdge1 (woman) - United Kingdom (Doncaster)

Today, I playfully nudged my friend on the shoulder. She countered by shoving me head-first into a trash can. FML

#16077994
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23315) - you deserved it (9430)

On 05/07/2011 at 12:26pm - misc - by Cheerieful - United States

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend, when he said "I love you, baby." I told him to go deeper, but instead of doing so, he decided to completely kill the mood by stopping and saying it again in a Barry White type voice. FML

#19388939
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23315) - you deserved it (9528)

On 04/01/2012 at 2:38pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States

Today, after months of job searching, I finally got a call about one of my applications. I wasn't able to answer it, but he left a voicemail. I've listened to it over and over, and I can't understand the contact information. He called from a restricted number. FML

#20033836
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23315) - you deserved it (1571)

On 08/21/2012 at 12:45pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boss asked me to take some of the female mannequins and change the outfits. As I was changing them, I realized that this was the most action I've gotten in almost a year. Not only am I twenty-seven, but I'm married. FML

#5346939
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23314) - you deserved it (3252)

On 09/19/2009 at 4:17am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, my car got acquainted with about 3 dozen eggs. FML

#17924502
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23312) - you deserved it (3065)

On 10/06/2011 at 11:21pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I after getting off the bus, I realized that the man I was talking to was distracting me so his "buddy" could steal my wallet. FML

#14573831
34 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23311) - you deserved it (3364)

On 01/14/2011 at 1:32am - money - by Anonymous - United States



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