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Today, I went indoor rock climbing with my uncle and his 5 year-old girl. I'm about halfway up the hardest ascent when my arm cramps up. As I stretched my arm, my cousin yells up at me in her tiny voice, "Prove you're a man and climb that wall!" I fell off. I was emasculated by a 5 year-old. FML

#7821444
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19187) - you deserved it (5023)

On 02/02/2010 at 7:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was watching a boys volleyball team warming up, and I had my eye on one of them who was quite attractive. He sent the ball a little too far and it hit me in the face. He apologized, and I then for some reason replied with, "It's fine, I like balls in my face." FML

#19475030
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19185) - you deserved it (36738)

On 04/15/2012 at 9:13pm - intimacy - by lifeonfire12 (woman) - Canada

Today, I had an anxiety attack because I thought I'd lost my anxiety medication. It ended up being on the shelf right where I left it. FML

#18260815
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19179) - you deserved it (9236)

On 11/16/2011 at 12:11am - health - by anxiety (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I was eating lunch, and accidentally got ketchup on the sofa, so I hastily doused it with stain remover. The ketchup is now no longer there; however there is a larger stain in its place. I stained the sofa with stain remover. FML

#19673245
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19179) - you deserved it (4018)

On 05/24/2012 at 3:23pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Sheffield)

Today, while at a boring lecture, I heard some people behind me whispering and laughing. I turned around, wondering what was so funny, which made them laugh even more. I then realised it looked like I'd been giving my pen a blowjob for the last 10 minutes. FML

#15386188
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19175) - you deserved it (31676)

On 03/19/2011 at 5:37pm - intimacy - by gayboii (man) - United Kingdom (Glasgow City)

Today, a customer at the Walmart I work at had a hissy fit and began throwing merchandise everywhere, including at my face, because we are Canadian and don't have a show called "Extreme Couponing" for "devoted shoppers" like her. FML

#20181556
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19175) - you deserved it (1447)

On 11/27/2012 at 6:46pm - work - by ohgodwhy - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I tried to treat a cut on my butt hole with Neosporin. I couldn't see it properly, so I had to use the front-facing camera on my phone. FML

#18973546
198 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19173) - you deserved it (6162)

On 02/01/2012 at 11:57pm - health - by 11niko (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, while on the bus, a small child asked me if I was having a baby, and I replied "Yes." I'm not. I was just too ashamed to admit I was fat. FML

#20040876
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19172) - you deserved it (9403)

On 08/25/2012 at 11:48am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, I'm participating in a 30 hour awareness-raising event on famine in Africa. I'm supposed to hand out leaflets to people from my booth. My school decided to hand out a literal crate-load of free cupcakes right in front of us. FML

#19239512
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19170) - you deserved it (2739)

On 03/08/2012 at 2:15pm - misc - by hungry - Canada

Today, I got a flat tire. The spare was also flat, so I had no other choice but to walk home. I got to my house and realized I'd left the front door key and garage clicker in my car 5 miles away. FML

#20044019
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19166) - you deserved it (8894)

On 08/27/2012 at 3:29am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, the girl I've been hitting on for months on MSN and that I'm about to meet told me "I know you are in love, and you know I'm not". Erm, no, I didn't know. FML

#464
16 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19165) - you deserved it (4382)

On 12/07/2008 at 3:46am - love - by Titanic - Sent from mobile version

Today, I stuffed my buttcrack with toilet paper right before my job interview because I tend to sweat there a lot and was wearing a white skirt. I went to the bathroom afterward to take it out but it wasn't there anymore. It could have only gone up two places. FML

#5836
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19165) - you deserved it (13338)

On 02/02/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by wtf - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I picked up my driver's licence and my keys off the floor at the same time, using only my toes. This was the highlight of my day. FML

#18949716
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19165) - you deserved it (5401)

On 01/30/2012 at 1:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Tasmania)



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