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Today, I realized if you leave a can of soda in parked car during a heatwave it will explode all over everything. My car is like a human glue trap. FML

#11895000
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19868) - you deserved it (24807)

On 07/15/2010 at 5:31am - misc - by bigmikenyc - United States

Today, marks the second week straight without sex. Being a newlywed isn't as great as I thought. FML

#7007388
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19867) - you deserved it (3839)

On 12/29/2009 at 2:12am - intimacy - by marriagesux - United States

Today, while playing The Sims 2, I realized I had a virtual person's whole life planned out, and have nothing planned out for myself. FML

#2282395
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19866) - you deserved it (45002)

On 05/25/2009 at 5:42pm - misc - by drurbanXVII (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was sitting next to the guy I am trying to get close to while we were at the bar. Music was playing, so I thought that while his attention was diverted I would sneak out a yawn. Just as I did so, the music went silent and I let out a tremendous burp. FML

#7351489
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19866) - you deserved it (7601)

On 01/15/2010 at 12:25am - love - by beriles (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was lying on my recliner watching TV when I dropped the remote under the footrest. I got down on my hands and knees and pushed the footrest into the chair. The moment I touched the remote, the footrest deployed and hit me square in the face. FML

#13035925
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19866) - you deserved it (5528)

On 09/13/2010 at 3:33pm - misc - by Joplin - United Kingdom

Today, my morning sickness was so bad that I threw up everywhere, just from thinking about the pretend meal that a kid had made for me. FML

#19787882
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19866) - you deserved it (2278)

On 06/14/2012 at 4:40pm - misc - by eeeee (woman) - United States

Today, while at a pool party, I found out the reason I got my new, white bikini at such a bargain price; it goes completely transparent when wet. I only realized this after everyone was staring at me and whistling. FML

#20119331
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19865) - you deserved it (11232)

On 10/16/2012 at 7:28am - misc - by bargainshopper (woman) - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, I found out my landlord is too cheap to turn up the hot water tank enough to have a comfortable shower. There's a huge padlock on the door, she won't budge, and I'm signed in until December. FML

#17962852
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19864) - you deserved it (1943)

On 10/11/2011 at 9:05pm - misc - by frigid - (Alberta)

Today, my mom bitched me out, calling me a selfish pig and saying that the reason I don't have a girlfriend is because I'm so conceited. All of this because I started watching the latest episodes of Breaking Bad without her. FML

#20026224
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19865) - you deserved it (3475)

On 08/17/2012 at 10:27am - misc - by elijah (man) - United States

Today, I found my missing shoe. It hit me as it fell out the tree in our front yard. FML

#18711671
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19860) - you deserved it (4111)

On 01/04/2012 at 11:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I had to be treated for chemical burns, because my mother got the bright idea of using paint thinner to clean me up after I'd painted our living room. FML

#20112154
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19859) - you deserved it (2611)

On 10/11/2012 at 3:03pm - health - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, at a fancy dress party, I got off with Hitler. FML

#17277146
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19857) - you deserved it (36120)

On 07/27/2011 at 3:23am - intimacy - by SallyGeen (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, I got a job in my university library. My job title is technical services. My actual job is pulling off the book label for the scanner and putting a new one on. For six hours a day. FML

#13325308
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19858) - you deserved it (4120)

On 10/05/2010 at 1:16am - misc - by danrocketman - United States (Texas)



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