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Today, I decided to dye my hair to freshen up my appearance. I asked my husband for his opinion, expecting him to recommend a color. He then asked me why going on a diet wasn't my first option. FML

#13077269
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26113) - you deserved it (11023)

On 09/16/2010 at 7:27pm - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I warned my boss that I couldn't take part in a very important meeting I've been working on for 6 months (my son is ill). "Never mind" he said, "We'll just put a pot plant on your seat". FML

#465
20 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26112) - you deserved it (2828)

On 12/07/2008 at 10:21pm - love - by Butterfly - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got up and left for work despite being really sick, because I had a big meeting. Halfway to work, in deadlocked traffic, my boss texts me to let me know he's rescheduling the meeting to tomorrow because of personal conflicts. FML

#13336627
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26112) - you deserved it (2662)

On 10/05/2010 at 11:20pm - work - by sick (woman) - United States

Today, while shopping with my sister, she asked me to wait for her while she quickly said hello to a friend. I sat on a bench for an hour before I realised she wasn't coming back. Turns out "hello" had turned into a date. FML

#21449387
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26112) - you deserved it (2224)

On 07/30/2015 at 2:56am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was outside, eating a sandwich, when I noticed a homeless man was standing in front of me. Upon making eye contact, he grabbed the rest of my sandwich and ran off. FML

#13816723
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26111) - you deserved it (4845)

On 11/12/2010 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I walked into a really fancy hotel bathroom. I spoke to the attendant and gave her my purse and coat while I used the toilet. When I came out, she was gone. The receptionist informed me they didn't have a bathroom attendant. FML

#20905582
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26109) - you deserved it (50659)

On 10/03/2013 at 1:41am - money - by wellcrap - United States (Texas)

Today, I told a girl that she had very pretty eyes. I then had to rinse pepper spray from my own. FML

#20059533
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26106) - you deserved it (2642)

On 09/05/2012 at 9:34pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, I was called an 'unhelpful little bitch' by a customer, after I informed her that we couldn't order a pair of shoes she wanted from the company in her size because it's a discontinued model. This little tirade continued for another few minutes, with her insulting me and my intelligence. FML

#19014850
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26105) - you deserved it (2327)

On 02/06/2012 at 11:27pm - work - by Unhelpful (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was attacked by a bird at 3 in the morning. The bird was being attacked by an owl, and decided the safest place to land wasn't in a tree, but my face. No-one will believe me, despite the 12 stitches across my face. FML

#19026198
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26100) - you deserved it (2087)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, after a 4 or 5 month-long dry spell, I woke up next to an amazing and beautiful woman. Neither of us were wearing pants. She looked me in the eyes and said, "Did I piss the bed?" FML

#21448401
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26100) - you deserved it (3135)

On 07/28/2015 at 2:44am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my wife sent me a Google Calendar reminder for "sex". FML

#21446247
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26098) - you deserved it (10821)

On 07/23/2015 at 10:33pm - intimacy - by stargate25 (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I found out the hard way what it sounds like when you take the first letter of my first name, A, and put it with my last name, Hole. FML

#18533442
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26097) - you deserved it (3698)

On 12/17/2011 at 2:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, I had yet another debilitating migraine that kept me awake. In the middle of the night, I heard an owl hooting. Thinking it was cool, I moved closer to the open window to hear better. After a few minutes, I realized it was actually my new neighbor having loud sex. My aunt moved in next door. FML

#21463837
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26095) - you deserved it (2102)

On 09/02/2015 at 5:52pm - intimacy - by Hooty (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)



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