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Today, I found out the hard way what it sounds like when you take the first letter of my first name, A, and put it with my last name, Hole. FML

#18533442
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26164) - you deserved it (3699)

On 12/17/2011 at 2:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, all day, in a huge blizzard, I've been stuck with a very nice, but very ugly, toothless and rather large and somewhat smelly woman, who has been continuously saying, "It feels like we're dating. Doesn't it feel like we're dating?" Ugh. No, no it doesn't. And please don't kill me. FML

#21344628
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26164) - you deserved it (2784)

On 01/26/2015 at 5:19pm - misc - by Yellow an (man) - United States

Today, I was taking a serious shit when the light bulb burned out. I am terrified of the dark and began wailing and crying. My mom had to pick the lock and get me out. I'm a 17 year old guy and captain of the Varsity football team. My little brother recorded it and plans on showing everyone. FML

#4350390
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26161) - you deserved it (63339)

On 08/07/2009 at 12:11am - misc - by scaredshitless (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend of 6 months was showing me his new phone. He accidentally opened his gallery, which contains 3 photos: one of his motorcycle, one of his new game console, and a naked photo of his ex. FML

#21436861
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26160) - you deserved it (2094)

On 07/05/2015 at 3:18pm - love - by wellthatsucks - United States

Today, my mom walked in on me masturbating. I minimized the porn on my laptop so she wouldn't see I was watching it. It turns out I was watching an old Beatles concert before I started masturbating. My mom thought I was masturbating to the Beatles. FML

#267368
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26159) - you deserved it (78763)

On 03/11/2009 at 12:42am - intimacy - by theassman (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, my brother "pranked" me by dropping my new laptop out my bedroom window. He'd set up a saran wrap safety net below to catch my laptop safely, but he didn't secure it well enough. My laptop is completely fucked and he won't accept responsibility because he didn't mean to break it. FML

#21507692
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26159) - you deserved it (1403)

On 12/25/2015 at 1:32pm - misc - by probably on death row soon (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, the woman I love told me she cared about me and didn't like me hurting myself. She then posted a picture of herself making-out with her new boyfriend. FML

#6433599
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26158) - you deserved it (5451)

On 11/24/2009 at 5:04am - love - by xX-SaD-FaCe-Xx (man) - Singapore

Today, I was getting frisky with my fiancée when she started talking about her dead great-grandma. FML

#13415176
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26156) - you deserved it (3409)

On 10/12/2010 at 12:48am - intimacy - by tdiz - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my Dad's banjo arrived, as part of his mid-life crisis. It would be fine if he could play it but unfortunately he's tone deaf. He hasn't stopped playing it for the last 4 hours. FML

#17927244
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26154) - you deserved it (2561)

On 10/07/2011 at 11:09am - misc - by anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I struggled through a one hour traffic jam to get to the airport to pick up my dad who was just coming back from an overseas trip. I got there only to find that he had given me the wrong date, and I had to drive home. Best part? I have to do it all over again tomorrow. FML

#18279451
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26157) - you deserved it (3281)

On 11/18/2011 at 5:49am - misc - by Etyl (woman) - Indonesia (Jawa Tengah)

Today, my dog vomited a writhing mass of maggots. It was the most disgusting thing I've ever smelled, and I was baffled as to where she found a maggot infested dead thing to eat. Baffled, until my mom reminded me that my cat has been missing, presumed dead, for over a week. FML

#21469594
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26153) - you deserved it (1621)

On 09/17/2015 at 5:08pm - animals - by wormsmeat (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, in an incredibly busy shopping center bathroom with my 5 year-old niece, I was squatting over the toilet seat to avoid germs. My niece then says at the top of her voice, "Auntie, why are you sitting like a kangaroo?" I'd say the whole room pissed their pants laughing. FML

#17910752
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26152) - you deserved it (8123)

On 10/05/2011 at 11:29am - kids - by Pissed (woman) - Australia

Today, I was at the theatre with my 4-year-old son who was situated on my lap. Halfway through the movie, he turns to face me and states loudly, "Mommy, your legs are so furry!". Everyone watching the show turned and stared at us. FML

#6747789
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26149) - you deserved it (8655)

On 12/14/2009 at 1:58am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)



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