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Today, I was riding my bike, when I saw a large dog sitting in front of a house. I started to really crank the pedals, figuring that by the time it saw me, I'd be long gone. My chain popped off, I lost control and crashed onto the side of the road. The dog hadn't moved. It was a statue. FML

#20510258
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22183) - you deserved it (18704)

On 02/17/2013 at 1:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I had to serve my boyfriend's father with a restraining order. FML

#20096065
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22180) - you deserved it (1726)

On 09/30/2012 at 11:21pm - love - by notgivingup (woman) - United States

Today, in the middle of the store, my daughter pointed at my belly and loudly announced that she was going to have a brother. I'm a man, and apparently I need to lose weight. FML

#20029295
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22177) - you deserved it (5512)

On 08/19/2012 at 1:30am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, while doing my job as a cart clerk, a gentleman went around the parking lot and picked some trash up, trying to help out. Faith in humanity: +1. About an hour later I saw a woman pick a bug off of her windshield and eat it. Faith in humanity: -200. FML

#20009222
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22177) - you deserved it (2230)

On 08/08/2012 at 7:23am - work - by TJ (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got stung by jellyfish. As I was writhing in pain on the beach, my dad comes up and asks me to be quiet and that I'm embarrassing him. FML

#19811574
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22177) - you deserved it (2254)

On 06/19/2012 at 6:32am - misc - by StungAlot (woman) - United States

Today, I came home from work to find my house was flooded from a broken pipe under the sink. My house had just recently had new wood floors, carpet and electrics installed because 6 months earlier my house had been flooded by the same pipe breaking. FML

#20047256
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22177) - you deserved it (2556)

On 08/29/2012 at 12:19am - misc - by me - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my right ear drum ruptured. My family doesn't understand that I only lost hearing in one ear and continues to talk about me behind my back, thinking I can't hear them. FML

#20106279
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22176) - you deserved it (1309)

On 10/07/2012 at 7:39pm - health - by lbelle - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I found out that my entire family thinks I have no friends, am expressionless (to quote, "a robot") and that my monotonous voice hints at the suppressed depression hidden deep inside me. According to them, I need psychic evaluation. It all came out at a family reunion. FML

#8993949
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22173) - you deserved it (3126)

On 03/11/2010 at 9:28am - misc - by talhabilal - Pakistan (Punjab)

Today, my boyfriend got done with Marine combat training. The first thing he asked for weren't pictures of me but pictures of his car. Missed you too babe. FML

#20198694
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22173) - you deserved it (2852)

On 12/10/2012 at 2:47am - love - by chels (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, at the gym, I realized the guy who has been staring at me for the past 3 days is the same guy I promised to text back 5 months ago. FML

#20954898
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22170) - you deserved it (45710)

On 11/12/2013 at 6:18am - love - by awkwardencounters - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I used the same credit card to apply to college and pay for a rave ticket. My card went through on the rave ticket but denied the college application fee. I guess my credit card is trying to tell me something about my future. FML

#6490055
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22169) - you deserved it (9214)

On 11/28/2009 at 2:23am - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend got mad at me because I refused to keep him company while he took a shit. FML

#19633395
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22168) - you deserved it (3452)

On 05/16/2012 at 6:38pm - misc - by HK (woman) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, my mom and I took my senile grandmother to the mall, since she doesn't get out much. She complained it was hot, then took her clothing off in the middle of the food court. It took us thirty minutes to make her put her shirt back on. FML

#20187746
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22167) - you deserved it (1914)

On 12/02/2012 at 9:05am - misc - by Sam - United States (Indiana)



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