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Today, I was going to my prom. My mom knows I want to drink so to prevent me, she made sure I took my prescription medicine before I left. I guess her way of stopping me from drinking is killing myself If I do. FML

#15503138
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13739) - you deserved it (33193)

On 03/26/2011 at 8:26pm - health - by coolkid111 - United States (New York)

Today, I had to pay my manager $10 just to take my stalker's order so I didn't have to. FML

#20087724
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13729) - you deserved it (1262)

On 09/25/2012 at 3:08am - work - by snowbell18 (woman) - United States

Today, after breaking up with my girlfriend of two years over the phone, I recieved a knock on my door. It was my now ex-girlfriend who came to seek revenge by shooting me in the balls with a paintball gun at about a three foot range. FML

#6994925
283 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13724) - you deserved it (47074)

On 12/28/2009 at 3:41pm - love - by lovehurts (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my 8 year old son cut his own hair. He did a better job than I ever did. I'm a hairdresser. FML

#17279085
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13722) - you deserved it (26296)

On 07/27/2011 at 12:35pm - kids - by buiuuum - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was working the graveyard shift as a security guard. I fell asleep in my car doing paperwork around 2 am. When my supervisor came to check on me, he pounded on my window, wearing a "Scream" mask. I panicked and pepper sprayed him. Too bad my window was closed. FML

#18208389
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13720) - you deserved it (29661)

On 11/10/2011 at 6:40am - work - by copshop - United States (California)

Today, I was using Veet instead of shaving, so that the razor wouldn't cut up my legs. I cut myself with the plastic utensil that you're supposed to use to remove the Veet. FML

#10683891
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13711) - you deserved it (20545)

On 05/22/2010 at 3:03am - health - by knickedleg - Sent from mobile version

Today, I took my dog for a walk. He started crapping on someone's lawn, then I noticed that the owner was outside and giving me a death stare. Not knowing what to do, I picked up the crap with my bare hands. The man started laughing at me. FML

#16009360
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13708) - you deserved it (42382)

On 05/01/2011 at 8:21pm - animals - by Cassie -

Today, I was giving a PowerPoint presentation in class. When I put my flash drive into the computer, my folder opened up and a nude picture of myself popped right up on a 110 inch projector screen for all 35 students to see. This is a 16 week course. FML

#18044835
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13705) - you deserved it (55152)

On 10/22/2011 at 9:25am - misc - by jaymash - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was skiing in Vermont for the third day straight. Since I was getting very little sleep, on the top of the chairlift I let out a huge yawn, pulling a muscle in my face. As I slid down the ramp, everyone saw me thrashing my head around and making funny, painful faces as I fell down. FML

#8292410
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13703) - you deserved it (3279)

On 02/15/2010 at 8:35am - misc - by Floof (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I parked my car on the street to go to the gym. When i came back my car was blocked by a parade of people. I turned to a shop worker smoking a cigarette and said "Jesus! What the hell is going on?" I got many strange looks. It was a Good Friday parade lead by a local church. FML

#920023
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13695) - you deserved it (41863)

On 04/11/2009 at 10:52pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I went shopping with my boyfriend. He tried on a pair of trousers which didn't fit, so he asked me to change them, so off I go. I then return with another pair for him to try on, and find him bent over and blurt out "What the hell's that terrible underwear?". The man turns around, revealing that I'd entered the wrong changing room. FML

#2607
18 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13689) - you deserved it (7571)

On 01/26/2009 at 5:09am - love - by Harmonia - Sent from mobile version

Today, my dad came to pick me up early for the Christmas break. He walked in on me cleaning all 19 of my sex toys. That's more than one sex toy per year that I've lived. I now have to face a 7-hour drive from Montreal to Toronto with him. FML

#18540985
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13687) - you deserved it (36464)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:18am - intimacy - by Une Fille (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I tried sneaking over to my girlfriends house to be romantic and knocked on her window. She went and got her mother to see who was at the window. FML

#18101485
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13685) - you deserved it (18780)

On 10/29/2011 at 3:43am - love - by Anonymous - United States



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