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Today, my cat played dead just so I would leave him alone. FML

#20126149
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18552) - you deserved it (5344)

On 10/21/2012 at 1:59am - animals - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to walk three miles home from work. Both my parents were at home. The reason they wouldn't collect me is apparently because I've "gotten so fat, your grandma cried after she saw you". FML

#14492583
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18553) - you deserved it (22261)

On 01/07/2011 at 12:46am - health - by biscuit (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I decided to take a nap while babysitting my neighbors kids for the day. I was woken up by this obnoxious sound, only to find the youngest kid holding scissors in one hand, a pony tail of hair in his shorts jumping around like a horse, oh, and a bald spot on the back of my head. FML

#3620845
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18548) - you deserved it (53437)

On 07/09/2009 at 8:19pm - kids - by armybrat - United States (Virginia)

Today, I walked downstairs with a couple of bags full of stuff, in preparation for a sleepover at my friend's house. My nine-year-old cousin looked at me and said, "Where're you going? Fat camp?" FML

#20064659
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18549) - you deserved it (3413)

On 09/09/2012 at 1:02pm - health - by Char (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, I found out that my mother is extremely emotional when it comes to animal deaths when a bird flew into the window and died, and she insisted we have a funeral. FML

#19441830
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18547) - you deserved it (3056)

On 04/10/2012 at 7:13am - animals - by tay (man) - Australia

Today, I was taking the subway to work when I saw a really hot girl. Noticing that she, like me, had a Dunkin' Donuts coffee, I tried to start a conversation by saying, "Is that Double Ds you have there?" She didn't pick up that I was talking about the coffee. FML

#1466459
300 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18545) - you deserved it (89297)

On 04/29/2009 at 6:46pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I had lunch with a couple of my friends and a guy I like. Another guy I have a crush on came and ate with us too. After lunch, one of the guys I have a crush on told me the other guy I like is sexy. FML

#1220
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18542) - you deserved it (3898)

On 01/15/2009 at 10:07am - love - by dexter - United States (California)

Today, my mom and I somehow got into a serious argument over the ethics of capturing and training Pokémon. FML

#19910380
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18542) - you deserved it (6719)

On 07/08/2012 at 5:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I'm so broke that I got buyer's remorse after buying a $2 bottle of pancake syrup. FML

#20042959
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18539) - you deserved it (2172)

On 08/26/2012 at 5:05pm - money - by Tanuki_paws - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was woken up by my neighbour's dog losing its mind, and I remembered reading a story about someone ignoring a dog and later finding out that their car had been stolen. Paranoid, I went outside to check on mine. Nope. Just the damn dog barking at one thirty in the morning. FML

#19219281
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18538) - you deserved it (3522)

On 03/05/2012 at 5:28am - misc - by DamnDogs (woman) - Canada

Today, my deranged wife somehow became convinced that vampires actually exist. She's now walking around with garlic powder caked into her clothing. I can't get the smell out of my nostrils. FML

#20147303
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18538) - you deserved it (1906)

On 11/04/2012 at 1:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I took some new allergy medicine I had never tried before, and I didn't bother reading the side effects. I then went to school. It was almost an hour before dismissal when I had felt a warm feeling on my legs. One of the side effects to my new medicine was bladder control problems. FML

#11906376
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18536) - you deserved it (23437)

On 07/15/2010 at 8:17pm - misc - by darthinvader (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to the orthodontist's to get my braces tightened, and I chose baby blue bands. Turns out they make my teeth look extremely yellow. Only a month and a half to go. FML

#19656239
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18533) - you deserved it (4198)

On 05/21/2012 at 7:40am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom



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