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Today, I received the photos my friend took of me proposing to my girlfriend. I'd proposed at the place we'd first met: the local zoo. When I looked them over, I noticed there was an elephant taking a poop in the background. FML

#19792340
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23065) - you deserved it (3824)

On 06/15/2012 at 1:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I had to walk through the blistering snow, because my boss needed something really important: cream cheese. FML

#8715488
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23064) - you deserved it (2531)

On 02/28/2010 at 11:00am - work - by Renesmeekuhnell (woman) - Denmark (Arhus)

Today, a guy said to me, "I'd really love to see that smile back at my place." Trying to be cute, I asked him if he was single. He replied with, "No, but I am a dentist. I could definitely fix that crossbite." FML

#20003299
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23064) - you deserved it (3044)

On 08/05/2012 at 1:23am - health - by wut (woman) - United States

Today, I got married. I received a beautifully wrapped gift from my dad. I was full of excitement until I opened it and found two taxidermied rabbits. The ones I had when I was in the fifth grade. FML

#20120354
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23065) - you deserved it (1716)

On 10/16/2012 at 10:48pm - money - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I lost my virginity. It took all of 30 seconds. FML

#8031607
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23062) - you deserved it (4775)

On 02/08/2010 at 10:33pm - intimacy - by unsatisfied - Sent from mobile version

Today, I am sick with a cold and I go to the most important interview of my life. A giant glob of wet snot comes out of my nose when I am expressing my desire to join their team. FML

#4150
17 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23061) - you deserved it (1796)

On 01/31/2009 at 1:20pm - work - by Larry - United States (California)

Today, I came home sick. After a while I received a text message. I thought it was a sweet 'how are you baby?' from my boyfriend. It wasn't. He sent: 'Hey, I'm going to work now. Please do not disturb. Thank you!' FML

#13861090
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23057) - you deserved it (5499)

On 11/16/2010 at 1:34am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, I learned that my building never received my rent check. Now not only do I have to pay a $40 late fee, but also a $40 fee to stop the payment of the check that went god knows where. FML

#6764410
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23056) - you deserved it (2689)

On 12/15/2009 at 1:18pm - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I told the man I love to "go first" when we started talking at the same time. I wanted to confess my feelings, he wanted to tell me about his engagement. FML

#1517
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23056) - you deserved it (1980)

On 01/17/2009 at 9:55pm - love - by biblio - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that my flatmate wears my underwear. FML

#21413767
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23057) - you deserved it (1785)

On 05/21/2015 at 10:22pm - misc - by anon - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, at my job as a produce clerk at a grocery store, I had an entire conversation with my coworker about how nice the new cabbage boxes are. This is all it takes to thrill me these days. FML

#18078433
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23053) - you deserved it (3150)

On 10/26/2011 at 2:36am - work - by insanitycalling - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was rubbing my lips against my boyfriend's lips when I said "Your mustache tickles" in a sexy tone. His response was "So does yours." FML

#12161985
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23051) - you deserved it (29302)

On 07/28/2010 at 7:20am - intimacy - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got yelled at for providing horrible customer service, in a store I don't even work for. FML

#20094580
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23052) - you deserved it (1679)

On 09/30/2012 at 1:32am - misc - by anonymous - Canada (Alberta)



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