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Today, when drunk, I became OCD about everything and spent 3 hours making sure that the books on my shelves were straight. I thought that being drunk was supposed to be fun. FML

#18323585
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26306) - you deserved it (9591)

On 11/23/2011 at 1:40am - health - by OCDrunk (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mom told me that Walmart had called and I had an interview at 9:30. I went to Walmart. They told me they didn't have any interviews set up. I went back home and listened to the voice-mail on her cellphone. It was the Subway in Walmart. I've been looking for a job for 3 months. FML

#19232064
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26305) - you deserved it (5104)

On 03/07/2012 at 6:14am - work - by Jake (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, I told the man I love to "go first" when we started talking at the same time. I wanted to confess my feelings, he wanted to tell me about his engagement. FML

#1517
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26304) - you deserved it (2305)

On 01/17/2009 at 9:55pm - love - by biblio - United States (Texas)

Today, for my birthday, my friends and family gave me: A Wii Fit, a free year at the gym and a book of diet recipes. They didn't consult with each other. I've asked for "something corresponding to me". FML

#6256305
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26303) - you deserved it (14778)

On 11/11/2009 at 11:03am - health - by Timetoloseweight (woman) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I got into my first car accident. I side swiped the truck next to me merging into another lane. He was in my blind spot. It was a cop. FML

#17112107
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26302) - you deserved it (13880)

On 07/14/2011 at 8:28pm - misc - by bym5052 (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while mowing the lawn, I was attacked by an underground hornet nest. I now have many stings, two scared dogs, and a mower still running outside. The hornets are swarming it and some are sitting on the lever, as if to turn it off. It's like they know. FML

#20121138
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26302) - you deserved it (1763)

On 10/17/2012 at 4:08pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)

Today, my fiancé changed his text message tone to a fart noise. He thinks it's hilarious and laughs every time he gets a text. He's 35 years old. FML

#17624611
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26300) - you deserved it (7176)

On 08/30/2011 at 9:28pm - love - by AMP4U - United States (California)

Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries. An hour and a half later, coming home with the groceries, I see the cops all around my house because my dad had called them, thinking that I had run away and stolen the car. FML

#20159802
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26299) - you deserved it (1587)

On 11/11/2012 at 11:30pm - misc - by me - United States (Indiana)

Today, while at work, I was asked if I wanted to leave early. I said no and let my co-worker go instead. Two hours later, I was punched in the face by one of my patients with absolutely no warning or provocation. FML

#6764357
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26295) - you deserved it (3784)

On 12/15/2009 at 1:04pm - work - by psychworker - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I found out that I am allergic to grass, and not supposed to mow lawns. My job is mowing lawns. FML

#19630951
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26296) - you deserved it (2260)

On 05/16/2012 at 3:36am - work - by jobless - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while giving my fiancé a hand-job, my ring got stuck in his pubes. We had to awkwardly get to the kitchen to get scissors. FML

Today, as I was cashing a customer out, he stopped me in the middle of the transaction just to tell me that the condoms he was buying are too big for him. FML

#20010874
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26294) - you deserved it (2319)

On 08/09/2012 at 2:44am - intimacy - by rxcrs3 - United States

Today, my mom made up a new game. She thinks it's hilarious to hide my brother's creepy Batman toy around the house to creep me out. This has been going on for hours and I still scream every time. FML

#20454752
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26293) - you deserved it (9887)

On 01/12/2013 at 1:36am - misc - by poohanne - United States (Louisiana)



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