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Today, I discovered something more dangerous than drivers who text: drivers who break your car windows with a bat while stopped at a red light. FML

#19514212
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23037) - you deserved it (1847)

On 04/22/2012 at 11:00pm - misc - by AngryLittleMan - United States

Today, I was on my hour long bus ride home with a full bladder. Right as the bus reached my stop, the time I spent holding it in was over. I didn't make it out of the aisle before I peed my pants. FML

#13145145
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23035) - you deserved it (6739)

On 09/21/2010 at 6:16pm - health - by forgotten (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I think my dad has finally lost his shit and is having a mid-life crisis. He showed up at my school and had me brought to the front desk. He told me to get in the car because we were going to have some "father-daughter bonding". This meant us watching Silent Hill with his work buddies. FML

#18095179
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23035) - you deserved it (2265)

On 10/28/2011 at 7:50am - misc - by -__- - Australia (Queensland)

Today, in a big argument, my sister uninvited my mom to her wedding. Trying to comfort my mom, I rented Mamma Mia knowing she's wanted to see it for a while. Turns out, Mamma Mia is a mother/daughter feel-good about the daughters wedding. I had no idea, and my mom cried the whole movie. FML

#1386673
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23033) - you deserved it (68128)

On 04/27/2009 at 8:54am - love - by mammamia (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was told to shovel four inches of snow from my driveway. I had to get the snow shovel from the rafters of my garage, and there were other tools with it. As I was yanking the shovel down, a pickax fell and smashed through the back window of my dad's Buick. FML

#7016410
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23031) - you deserved it (5245)

On 12/29/2009 at 3:26pm - misc - by Charlie8u347 (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found the best cure for constipation is having my brother scare the literal shit out of me, in Walmart. FML

#19532255
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23031) - you deserved it (2248)

On 04/26/2012 at 1:29pm - health - by crazyk2468 (man) - United States (California)

Today, for the 5th day in a row, I had to keep my 7-year-old home from school and search his poop because he "forgot" he's not supposed to swallow things like, in this case, a screw that fell off his scooter. FML

#17735426
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23031) - you deserved it (3626)

On 09/13/2011 at 9:43am - misc - by OopsMonkey - Netherlands (Noord-Holland)

Today, after suffering from constipation for three days, I finally took a dump. Just as things reached the point of no return, my land line and doorbell all rang. FML

#14752414
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23029) - you deserved it (2729)

On 01/29/2011 at 1:06am - health - by Poopie (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was attacked by a bird at 3 in the morning. The bird was being attacked by an owl, and decided the safest place to land wasn't in a tree, but my face. No-one will believe me, despite the 12 stitches across my face. FML

#19026198
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23029) - you deserved it (1839)

On 02/08/2012 at 12:45pm - misc - by Anonymous -

Today, I removed all my online dating profiles. Apparently my ex-husband finds stalking me online preferable to spending time with his new girlfriend. FML

#13270090
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23027) - you deserved it (2667)

On 09/30/2010 at 10:54pm - misc - by anon (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out I sleepwalk. How you might ask? By awakening the moment just before I fell from the stairs. I was better off sleeping. FML

#12687982
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23026) - you deserved it (2181)

On 08/22/2010 at 7:51pm - misc - by Eloy Ymer - Netherlands (Gelderland)

Today, I fractured a bone in my knee. Now not only do I have to wear a huge knee brace for the next two months, I'll have to sit around in a hotel room all of next week while my family has fun skiing in the mountains. FML

#19378984
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23025) - you deserved it (2391)

On 03/30/2012 at 9:43pm - health - by Fractured - United States

Today, I witnessed my neighbor draining his sewage-clogged plumbing into my backyard. FML

#17630821
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23024) - you deserved it (1702)

On 08/31/2011 at 4:15pm - misc - by EwwGross - United States (New Jersey)



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