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Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw a brick down the laundry-chute. Guess who spent the night at the hospital. FML

#20097230
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19120) - you deserved it (1338)

On 10/01/2012 at 7:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, I was masturbating in my room when my dog started to bark obnoxiously. He does this all the time so I ignored it and kept going. This went on for about a half hour. When I went downstairs, I found an open door and an empty TV stand. FML

#691341
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19116) - you deserved it (86951)

On 03/29/2009 at 10:08pm - animals - by trainE - United States (Michigan)

Today, I went for a job interview. I was asked if I wanted a drink. I have no idea why, but I replied "a bottle of milk please." FML

#15855605
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19114) - you deserved it (29505)

On 04/20/2011 at 4:10am - work - by bham boy -

Today, I wanted nothing more than to go home and get into bed. While I was unlocking my front door, the flimsy key snapped off inside the lock. A locksmith was called out, who did nothing but sadistically guffaw at my misfortune and crack sarcastic jokes as he undid the lock. FML

#20399681
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19114) - you deserved it (2228)

On 12/14/2012 at 6:12pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my boss got a promotion and I got laid off. FML

#837
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19112) - you deserved it (1688)

On 01/01/2009 at 1:21pm - work - by - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up to an email confirming my membership to a dating site. Turns out my mother is as annoyed by my loveless life as I am. FML

#19708728
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19113) - you deserved it (2077)

On 05/31/2012 at 7:29am - love - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, at work, one of my 6 year old students who has had intense speech therapy since kindergarten, told me "I can tell you're hot, because you rolled your sleeves up." I was very pleased with his articulate sentence, until he said "Your arms are hairy." FML

#14063291
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19109) - you deserved it (3773)

On 12/02/2010 at 7:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I invited my boyfriend to his first dinner out with my family. As my older brother was discussing the injuries he'd received while working as a tow truck driver, my innocent 10 year old brother piped up saying he should see what I did to my boyfriend's back with my nails. FML

Today, while walking around my college campus, I passed by a dorm where a drunk guy was peeing out one of the top floor windows while his drunk friends cheered him on. That guy is my boyfriend. Lucky me. FML

#19883024
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19104) - you deserved it (6076)

On 07/02/2012 at 9:53pm - misc - by 21! (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I finally picked up my new bank card after my old one was stolen. It took the bank six weeks and five separate orders to figure it out, on top of which they've charged me a rush fee. FML

#20046256
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19104) - you deserved it (1508)

On 08/28/2012 at 1:50pm - money - by annoyed (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my friends and I held an intervention for my fiancé. He's been talking and behaving like an "old-timey cowboy" non-stop for the last three months. Our wedding is in a month and he refuses to marry me if I can't accept his "life choices." FML

#20149952
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19099) - you deserved it (3096)

On 11/06/2012 at 12:42am - love - by cowgirl (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, thanks to Grand Theft Auto, I found myself seriously thinking about holding up an armored bank truck when I saw it in traffic. FML

#20889286
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19097) - you deserved it (33981)

On 09/20/2013 at 6:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States



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