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Today, I went to a party dressed as a zombie. Everyone admired my hilarious "zombie dancing". Those were my regular dance moves. FML

#19602686
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19081) - you deserved it (4546)

On 05/10/2012 at 2:10pm - misc - by tinydancer (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, a woman at the crowded mall stopped me and told me loudly that if I bought her product it would get rid of my acne. FML

#974
25 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19078) - you deserved it (1838)

On 01/11/2009 at 3:59pm - health - by EpicFail - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I asked my dad why he only has pictures of me from when I was a little kid. Without skipping a beat, he said, "I only keep pictures from when I liked you." FML

#20894041
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19076) - you deserved it (1901)

On 09/24/2013 at 3:23am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nebraska)

Today, I was watching a movie alone with my girlfriend. She shifted positions as I put my arm around her, and ended up kneeing me in the crotch and shouldering me in the throat simultaneously. FML

#20016514
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19069) - you deserved it (1918)

On 08/12/2012 at 5:23am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I got myself an organ donor card, just to feel wanted. FML

#19190899
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19066) - you deserved it (4702)

On 02/29/2012 at 7:09pm - misc - by Vandrefalk - Norway

Today, my ex-boyfriend came over to visit. Being nice, I let him walk down the stairs first, following after him. I still managed to reach the bottom before he did; after taking one step, I lost my footing and fell all the way down, scraping the skin off my arms and legs, and bruising my butt. FML

#14011606
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19066) - you deserved it (4217)

On 11/28/2010 at 12:17pm - misc - by brelni - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my friends and I had a long fun day at the river. That was until sundown. I now have mosquito bites in places you don't want to know. FML

#10511557
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19063) - you deserved it (10051)

On 05/13/2010 at 6:49pm - animals - by Alicia - United States (California)

Today, I went out for lunch with a guy I hadn't seen in a couple of months. He seemed to be staring at my chest quite a bit, but I wasn't too bothered by it. Turns out there was still an XL sticker on my shirt. FML

#20074089
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19057) - you deserved it (5881)

On 09/16/2012 at 3:00am - love - by distracted - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out that the woman from My Strange Addiction who can't stop picking her scabs is married. I've been single for two years and I don't even pick my nose. FML

#20179069
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19053) - you deserved it (2972)

On 11/25/2012 at 11:39pm - love - by Sam (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I got a speeding ticket. I wrote a check, and on the way to deposit my fine, I got another one. I put both fines in a box down town, and I turned around to see a cop putting a parking ticket under my wind-shield wiper. FML

#11857753
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19033) - you deserved it (43440)

On 07/13/2010 at 7:15pm - misc - by Criminal (man) - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I shaved my legs. I received endless compliments about how great they looked, and how jealous all the girls were. I'm a guy who shaved them for a themed party, for which I dressed up as a girl. FML

Today, it's the first day of my two-week stay at my in-laws' house. They forbid drinking, smoking, cursing, and anything even remotely sexual. I smuggled in my quietest toy to keep me sane in this holy house. If only I hadn't forgotten to bring the battery pack too. FML

#20184036
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19032) - you deserved it (25253)

On 11/29/2012 at 2:42pm - intimacy - by comeuntome (woman) - United States

Today, like every month, the beautician spent 10 minutes removing the hairs from my stomach. I'm a girl. FML

#887
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19027) - you deserved it (2151)

On 01/09/2009 at 12:18am - misc - by Noname - Sent from mobile version



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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

Thursday 11 September 2014

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