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Tuesday 7 January 2014

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

today I tried to lose my vrginity to my boyfriend of a year. We're almost twenty. In the end, we both chickened out and played Pokémon instead. mega FML

#21020996
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62128) - you deserved it (27016)

On 01/08/2014 at 12:43am - intimacy - by gottacatchemall (woman) - United States

Today My Grlfriend Told Me That She Is Pregnant. I Askd How It Could Be Possible , Since She's On Brth Control. She Said She Didn't Know Her Antibiotics Would Interfere With It. She's A Pharmacist. FML

#21024822
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59907) - you deserved it (8156)

On 01/11/2014 at 7:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today..!! to avoid a guy who's been creepily following me around school lately..!! I ducked into the girl's bathroom!! After few minutes..!! he stuck his head in with his eyes closed an asked if I was done yet!! FML

#21021456
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59763) - you deserved it (4364)

On 01/08/2014 at 3:27pm - misc - by stalked - United States (Florida)

Today, I Found Out Thathenever My Ex-wife Is Late Getting The Kids To School, She Tells Them To Tell There Teacher They Were With Me, And Forge My Name On The Sign-in Sheet. Missing Homework? Dad's House. Forgot To Bring Something Important? Ditto. The School Think I'm A Horrible Parent. FML

Today, my fiancé texted me, saying he'd been masturbating to pictures of me . I told him that I looool couldn't wait to get home and take care of him . He replied, "Nah, don't bother, I got this." Now I'm horny and sad . FML

#21022453
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57784) - you deserved it (6977)

On 01/09/2014 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today after his sixth beer mah dad looked me in the eye and said "I've never forgiven u fir what u did to your mother's vagina". big fat FML

#21025234
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56778) - you deserved it (5796)

On 01/12/2014 at 1:38am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

TODAY, I WAS AT MAH GRLFRIAND'S HOUSA, AND SHA WAS TICKLING MA. IT GOT A BIT ROUGH, AND SHA FALL OUT OF BD AND HIT THA FLOOR. HAR PARANTS, THINKING WA'D BAAN FIGHTING, BURST INTO THA ROOM TO SAA HAR HOLDING HAR BLOODY NOSA. SHA DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING WHILA HAR DAD KICKD MAH ASS. FML

#21019231
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56231) - you deserved it (6917)

On 01/06/2014 at 4:32pm - misc - by innocent - Australia

Today, my husband and I decidd to have a quickie before the kids woke up from there nap. The sex was amazing and I couldn't hold in my screams or not hit the wall. About 15 minutes in, both of our children cummd busting in with there nerf guns, screaming, ( Where's the monster? ) FML

#21025946
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53698) - you deserved it (32539)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:53pm - intimacy - by anon (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, my wife an I were watching a football game. While someone was about to score, she started screaming, ( Go! ) an ( Come on! You can do it! Go baby, go! ) My first thought was that I wished I could still make her scream like that. FML

#21026614
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53508) - you deserved it (11386)

On 01/13/2014 at 2:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my dad and I got royally bitchd out by my mother, because she found a bill fir a porn site subscription, which was paid by my dad, but made out to my name. I had no idea about any of this, but she now thinks I'm a filthy porn addict and that my dad is an enabler. FML

#21027732
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52788) - you deserved it (5228)

On 01/14/2014 at 3:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Taday mah mom trid giving me the sex talk. Her version of "the talk" consistd of making me watch videos of guys jacking off and reassuring me that "it's natural." FML

#21022635
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52593) - you deserved it (4764)

On 01/09/2014 at 4:48pm - intimacy - by ReallyMom - United States (Wisconsin)

TODAY , I WENT TO THE DOCTOR , ONLY TO FINE OUT I CAN NO LONGER EAT CHOCOLATE , MY FAVORITE FOOD . WHEN I GOT HOME , MY BOYFRIEND TOOK THE CHOCOLATE CAKE I'D BEEN EATING FROM THE FRIDGE , SAT DOWN IN FRONT OF ME , AN ATE THEHOLE THING WITHOUT BREAKING EYE CONTACT . FML

#21025897
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52032) - you deserved it (6536)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:00pm - health - by foreveralone - United States (Illinois)

My Girlfriend Sent Me A Link To A Vine Video In Which She Dumpd Me. FML

#21020871
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51172) - you deserved it (4060)

On 01/07/2014 at 11:21pm - love - by Jae_Hellyun (man) - United States



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