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Sunday 24 November 2013

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Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She asked if the ring was a temporary thing until I got a better one, saw my dumbfounded face, then played it off as a joke and said yes. I later found out she'd posted on Facebook bitching about the ring, but with the privacy setting set to hide it from me. FML

by fuckface? I wish / 11/30/2013 at 3:29pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Love

Today, after moving miles to be with my boyfriend, I logged onto his computer just in time to see his other girlfriend had sent naked pictures. FML

by unluckylassy / 11/27/2013 at 7:01pm / Ireland / Intimacy

Today, my fiancée broke up with me over text message while I was away for work. She later posted photos of her and her new boyfriend on Facebook, while still wearing my engagement ring. FML

by grantsidiots / 11/27/2013 at 12:51am / Australia (Queensland) / Love

Today, I had to explain to my pregnant friend that her plan to get drunk and get a tattoo needed to wait at least 8 months. She then went out for a smoke to calm down. FML

by Anonymous / 11/22/2013 at 9:49am / United States (North Carolina) / Health

Today, I realized my girlfriend has been "on her period" for almost two months. FML

by Jack / 11/30/2013 at 3:31am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend went down on me. I don't know why, but my mind wandered. He now thinks that he has the skills of a porn star, while I'm pretty sure that finally solving a mathematical problem I've been working on for a week caused me to orgasm. FML

by you+me-clothes=53>< / 11/19/2013 at 12:13pm / Austria (Wien) / Intimacy

Today, my obsessive ex, who recently cut my phone line to stop me from talking to my boyfriend of three years, got a job at the same restaurant where both my boyfriend and I work. FML

Today, my boss claimed that I've been lying to get days off because apparently nobody can be so unlucky as to have three family members die within a month. I am just that unlucky, and suspended. FML

by unemployed and bereaved / 11/25/2013 at 12:03am / United Kingdom / Work

Today, I helped a nice middle-aged lady pick out a sweater. She then opened her changing room door to ask for my opinion. I still don't understand why she had to take everything else off to try on a sweater. FML

by Anonymous / 11/24/2013 at 12:30am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, the guy I like shoved me out of the way so he could talk to another girl. FML

by Anonymous / 11/20/2013 at 4:06pm / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, after having some drinks at the club, I went home with this awesome girl. When I woke up, I thought the house looked really familiar. It belonged to my ex's younger sister. FML

by sister sister / 11/25/2013 at 12:38pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I overheard my parents talking about me and discussing how I've never had a boyfriend. My mum laughed that maybe they should pay someone to go out with me, and my dad replied, "Heh, not enough money in the world." FML

by katerina / 11/29/2013 at 5:27pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I realized that my 5 year old son has more money saved up in his piggy bank than I have in my actual bank account. FML

by poorman / 11/18/2013 at 5:14pm / United States (Maryland) / Money