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Wednesday 11 September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my workplace was having a "prices are down" promotion. I had to wear a badge that said, "Down and staying down" all day, opening myself up to a lot of weirdos winking at me or saying, "Oh yeah, I bet you are". FML

#20878038
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39972) - you deserved it (2892)

On 09/12/2013 at 3:42am - work - by hawkwardd - Australia

Today, at my first day on the job, a customer threatened my life because our vending machine had run out of Doritos. FML

#20880018
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39702) - you deserved it (2978)

On 09/13/2013 at 7:13pm - work - by Anonynommer (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my girlfriend came home with a huge bouquet of roses. They were from an admirer, brainwashing her to think I'm a terrible boyfriend for not buying her flowers like he did. FML

#20883435
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39674) - you deserved it (10726)

On 09/16/2013 at 3:26am - love - by Oh hells no (man) - United States (California)

Today, I got fired from my volunteer job. FML

#20879963
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39360) - you deserved it (9815)

On 09/13/2013 at 6:24pm - work - by Volunteer (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I got really excited when I got an email from a guy I've been flirting with in my math class. Turns out he thinks I stole his calculator and wants it back immediately. There goes my chance. FML

#20880890
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39310) - you deserved it (3108)

On 09/14/2013 at 1:04pm - love - by crushed (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was getting my cat some canned food. Out of habit I licked the spoon after I had emptied the can only to realize too late what I had done. FML

#20886441
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39250) - you deserved it (17078)

On 09/18/2013 at 10:53am - animals - by OldHabitsDieHard - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I woke up and saw that my alarm clock had fallen on the floor. It read 9:05 am. I panicked because I was late for work. As I frantically got ready, I went to pick my alarm clock up to place it back on my nightstand when I realized it was upside down. The actual time was 5:06. FML

#20879453
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39240) - you deserved it (6709)

On 09/13/2013 at 9:24am - misc - by NoorFML (woman) - United States

Today, in order to try and get over my slight fear of swans, I went down to the local park to feed them. One decided that I looked tastier than the bread I was throwing and chased me around the feeding area while everybody laughed. FML

#20875531
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39054) - you deserved it (5757)

On 09/10/2013 at 7:36am - animals - by Evil_Angel_90 (woman) - Australia

Today, I found out my roommate Skypes my friends on my laptop when I'm away. Not only that, he covers his face and shows them his junk. My friends no longer answer Skype calls from me. FML

#20886799
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38666) - you deserved it (4295)

On 09/18/2013 at 5:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Ohio)

Today, one of my online friends told me he's bought a plane ticket, so he can come visit me. I've told him multiple times before that I'm uncomfortable with this idea, but he keeps telling me to stop joking, and reminding me that he'll have no other place to stay. FML

Today, while at the zoo, I found out that the rhinos there can pee backwards, while standing directly behind one. FML

#20874616
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38302) - you deserved it (4064)

On 09/09/2013 at 4:51pm - animals - by Are you kidding me? - United States (Kansas)

Today, I noticed that my new colleague never laughs. Instead she says, "LOL". I have to work with her every day. FML

#20884887
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38296) - you deserved it (2584)

On 09/17/2013 at 4:26am - work - by Jienaf (man) - Malta

Today, my boss took me to one side and said, "Cross me like that ever again, and you're fired." I have no clue what he was talking about, and he denies ever having said a word to me. FML

#20882475
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37879) - you deserved it (2538)

On 09/15/2013 at 2:47pm - work - by what... (man) - United States (Florida)



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