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Friday 26 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I helped my buddy write a sweet love letter to his girlfriend. After reading it, she dumped him for being an "Edward Cullen wannabe", and when my girlfriend found out, she dumped me for "cheating" on her by writing the letter in the first place. FML

#20802821
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49583) - you deserved it (5756)

On 07/25/2013 at 12:17pm - love - by ........................... (man) - Mexico (Distrito Federal)

Today, I found out why we've had to replace 3 washing machines this year. My sister thinks that "huge capacity" means "load the washing machine until no more clothes will fit." It blows the motor every time. She's 31. FML

#20806007
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49375) - you deserved it (3944)

On 07/27/2013 at 5:26am - misc - by kilamo80 (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my husband bought me a big box of tampons. He claims to know when my period is about to start before I do. Sadly, he's right. FML

#20812881
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49252) - you deserved it (8238)

On 07/31/2013 at 2:31am - love - by RayneWolf13 (woman) - United States (Arkansas)

Today, my mom confessed to loving my "little sister" more than she loves me. My "little sister" is the family dog. FML

#20808417
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48625) - you deserved it (3540)

On 07/28/2013 at 6:34pm - animals - by the un-loved child - United States (California)

Today, a customer pulled a knife on me after I informed him that we'd run out of avocados to put on his pizza. FML

#20815101
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48560) - you deserved it (3529)

On 08/01/2013 at 11:18am - work - by are these people even HUMAN? (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my horse farted and scared itself, then ran all the way up the hill and wouldn't stop until I fell off. FML

#20807336
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48053) - you deserved it (4033)

On 07/28/2013 at 12:28am - animals - by mishyb (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was at Walmart. A guy in a mobility scooter bumped into me, then told me to "get the fuck out of the way." When I told him to watch his mouth, he got up and shoved me into a shelf. Just a few minutes prior, he'd yelled that he was paralyzed from the waist down. FML

#20797503
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47948) - you deserved it (3245)

On 07/22/2013 at 12:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, I did a photoshoot with my boyfriend and his buddy. We drove out to the countryside and set up on top of a hill. My boyfriend kept having me move further and further back. I eventually fell and rolled down the steep hill, while he and his buddy high-fived each other. FML

#20808454
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47777) - you deserved it (6971)

On 07/28/2013 at 6:58pm - misc - by -_- (woman) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, we got a new employee at work. I said hi, and told her that if she needed help figuring out our computer system, then to give me a call. She promptly accused me of sexual harassment and filed a complaint against me. FML

Today, I attended the funeral of a close friend. Most of the other guests were openly grinning and joking around, and the guy in front of me kept muttering "that's what she said" during the eulogy. FML

#20817315
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47507) - you deserved it (2917)

On 08/02/2013 at 4:58pm - misc - by fuck people (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend suggested that we become "drug dealers" because I'm a chemistry student and he's seen a few episodes of Breaking Bad. FML

#20812711
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47420) - you deserved it (5036)

On 07/31/2013 at 12:50am - misc - by Bnewlove - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I had to wake my mom up. While she was naked. On the toilet. FML

Today, after a church service, a man approached me as I was walking to my car. He had tears in his eyes and politely asked if I would pray with him. He asked if we could hold hands. As I reached out to hold his hands, the bitch snatched my purse and ran. FML

#20797008
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47275) - you deserved it (8277)

On 07/22/2013 at 3:09am - misc - by HillaryAngelic (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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