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Thursday 11 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after my parents left for the weekend, my "friends" decided to throw a party at my house despite my protests. In order to get them to leave, I called the police. I was the only one arrested, while they got warnings. FML

#20783919
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46965) - you deserved it (8308)

On 07/15/2013 at 7:46am - misc - by ugh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, one of my co-workers was fired after my manager discovered him pissing in the office coffee pot. I had three cups before I found out what had happened. FML

#20780355
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46834) - you deserved it (3684)

On 07/13/2013 at 5:10pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Maryland)

Today, I finally convinced my mum to take me to a psychologist. As soon as he sat me down and asked me how I was doing, my mum burst into tears and went on a rant about how her life is terrible and she regrets everything. I was asked to sit in the waiting room. She used up my whole hour. FML

#20787656
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46667) - you deserved it (3080)

On 07/17/2013 at 1:22am - health - by :-( - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had to turn down an invitation to one of my best friend's birthday party because I had been scheduled to work. Little did I know that my job on that day would be setting up the tents, tables, and chairs for that very birthday party. FML

#20783466
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46595) - you deserved it (3935)

On 07/15/2013 at 1:14am - work - by Sam - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked in on my daughter hugging and sobbing into her Edward Cullen cut-out. She won't tell me what's wrong, yet she can confide in a creepy fictional stalker whose facial expression is locked to "chronically constipated". Where did I go wrong? FML

#20778274
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46380) - you deserved it (6792)

On 07/12/2013 at 7:18pm - kids - by So little trust. (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I walked to work. I later discovered that my husband had parked my car in a no-parking area. My job is towing cars. I had to tow my own car. FML

#20775203
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46262) - you deserved it (4558)

On 07/10/2013 at 11:04pm - work - by Anonymous -

Today, my pre-teen brother has started using the entire Axe line because he believes that it will give him an "edge with the ladies". He insists on using the products at least three times a day, including before bedtime. I'm allergic to anything that is perfumed. We share a room. FML

#20790014
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46210) - you deserved it (3110)

On 07/18/2013 at 5:29am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I had my driver's test in rural Maine. I hit a cow. FML

#20777070
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45959) - you deserved it (12881)

On 07/12/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maine)

Today, my water broke. I called my mom, who had agreed to watch my other two kids while I went to the hospital. When I asked her to come over, she just said, "Sorry, now isn't a good time." FML

#20781242
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45610) - you deserved it (3101)

On 07/14/2013 at 12:32am - health - by Upset Mommy - United States

Today, I went on a blind date. The guy greeted me with a "What's up, bitch?", which I wrote off as him just being really laid-back. By dessert, he'd asked me if my boobs are real, then when we finished, asked how many more dates it'd take before I put out. So much for that. FML

#20777868
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45329) - you deserved it (6336)

On 07/12/2013 at 3:33pm - love - by ElodieUNU (woman) - France

Today, I had an allergy test. Not only was I allergic to 35 out of the 40 items, they also found out that I'm allergic to the latex gloves my doctor happened to be wearing. Now my entire back is covered in a rash that will last at least another week. FML

#20783362
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45312) - you deserved it (2680)

On 07/15/2013 at 12:23am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was using a public restroom. As I lowered my pants, a man's head and arms popped out over the divider. He took a picture and immediately rushed out. FML

#20779019
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45255) - you deserved it (2747)

On 07/13/2013 at 12:40am - misc - by Anna - United States (New York)

Today, I told the guy I liked about my crush on him. He said he would keep me in mind if he ever hits rock bottom. FML

#20786950
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45223) - you deserved it (3304)

On 07/16/2013 at 7:41pm - love - by hannahisacooler (woman) - United States (California)



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