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Thursday 11 July 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my girlfriend guilted me into roleplaying as Justin Bieber before and during sex. I now feel physically ill. FML

#20788707
238 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55462) - you deserved it (18775)

On 07/17/2013 at 4:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found out my boyfriend regularly has his ex stay over. They even share a bed. He doesn't see a problem with this. FML

#20774058
164 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54916) - you deserved it (4987)

On 07/10/2013 at 10:18am - love - by Paige (woman) - United Kingdom (Essex)

Today, I had to pull one of those toy stretchy hands out of my dog's butthole. It slapped me in the face when I finally got it out. FML

#20787584
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54791) - you deserved it (6482)

On 07/17/2013 at 12:48am - animals - by anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I came home at 1am to find my mom sitting on my couch, ranting about how I'm not supposed to stay up this late. I'm 26 and I don't know how she got into my house. FML

#20775513
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54728) - you deserved it (3103)

On 07/11/2013 at 2:26am - misc - by whowhat (man) - United States

Today, a coworker complimented me on losing weight, and said that she wished she could drop a few pounds too. I was too embarrassed to tell her that the only reason I've lost weight is because I haven't been able to afford to eat. FML

#20775505
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54270) - you deserved it (3389)

On 07/11/2013 at 2:20am - work - by shouldbehappyiguess (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I found out that the weird guy that lives next door is my biological father. FML

#20776380
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54179) - you deserved it (3013)

On 07/11/2013 at 6:26pm - misc - by yayme. - United States (North Dakota)

Today, after I got turned down for yet another job, my dad glanced up at me and casually remarked that porn is always a stable market. FML

#20776199
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54026) - you deserved it (5772)

On 07/11/2013 at 3:50pm - intimacy - by fucked up dad (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, my mom got drunk and punched me in the nose, then yelled at me for bleeding on the carpet. FML

#20777221
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54000) - you deserved it (4214)

On 07/12/2013 at 3:22am - misc - by ouch (man) - United States

Today, I tried coming on to my fiancé. He just pushed me off and got out of bed, saying he wasn't in the mood. A half hour later, I caught him jerking off to several windows of porn. FML

#20790603
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53831) - you deserved it (5738)

On 07/18/2013 at 3:01pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Limburg)

Today, my sister announced her pregnancy at my husband's funeral. FML

#20782670
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53747) - you deserved it (2603)

On 07/14/2013 at 6:52pm - misc - by thatsfine (woman) - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my girlfriend was sitting on my lap at a birthday party. She thought it would be funny to fart. I came instantly. FML

#20785133
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53087) - you deserved it (18213)

On 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm - intimacy - by needsnewshorts (man) - United States (California)

Today, my wife and I were having a fight, when she grabbed my car keys and threw them over into the neighbors overgrown junk yard. My car is a restored '59 Belvedere and the keys can't be replaced. I've been looking for hours and I still can't find them. FML

#20786212
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52758) - you deserved it (7491)

On 07/16/2013 at 12:06pm - love - by ronnieG (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went to the grocery store with my husband, only to find that his ex-wife worked there. Then I found out he never actually divorced her. FML

#20786957
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52202) - you deserved it (3351)

On 07/16/2013 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by me:( - United States (Michigan)



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