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Thursday 25 April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, while grocery shopping, I was having such terrible abdominal pains I could hardly walk. As I'm 8 months pregnant, I told my husband we should head home. He thought a better idea was to run through the store and hide from me, hoping to induce labor by making me chase him. FML

#20619241
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44184) - you deserved it (3668)

On 04/24/2013 at 8:18pm - misc - by pregz (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was yelled at and called a pedophile by a mom for talking to her 5 year old girl. I work at a library and she looked like she needed help. This is the third time it has happened. FML

#20621829
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43930) - you deserved it (3575)

On 04/25/2013 at 9:37pm - kids - by LibraryPedo (man) - United States (California)

Today, my whole family made an hour-long drive to a restaurant that's just a few minutes away from my place. I wasn't invited. FML

#20626789
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43888) - you deserved it (3007)

On 04/28/2013 at 1:23am - misc - by lonesome - Canada

Today, it was my wedding day. My new husband and I, for a laugh, did our first dance to LMFAO's "I'm sexy and I know it" with stupid moves and everything. 200 guests. Nobody laughed. FML

#20618965
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43843) - you deserved it (24379)

On 04/24/2013 at 6:29pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Gloucestershire)

Today, at work, I was screamed at and slapped by a woman for supposedly violating her 2nd Amendment rights. In reality, I'd simply turned her away from the 10 items or less line because she had well over the allowed number of items. I've no fucking idea what's wrong with some people. FML

#20623583
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43658) - you deserved it (2856)

On 04/26/2013 at 6:03pm - work - by fuck you walmart (woman) - United States

Today, I had a formal complaint filed against me for being outrageously rude to a customer. All I did was tell a customer that she couldn't use food stamps at the movie theater. FML

#20620985
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43623) - you deserved it (2475)

On 04/25/2013 at 3:37pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out that I am allergic to one of the preservatives that they put in aloe. I found this out after I put some on a severe sunburn I have. Not only am I sunburned, but now I am severely itchy as well. FML

#20613229
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43399) - you deserved it (3704)

On 04/22/2013 at 2:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had a big party planned. All but one of the guests cancelled. See you at 7, mom. FML

#20630222
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42611) - you deserved it (3336)

On 04/29/2013 at 12:09pm - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands

Today, my husband rejected sleeping with me because he wants to "save his energy" for building his custom car. Apparently, I'm a "distraction." FML

#20615528
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42595) - you deserved it (5748)

On 04/23/2013 at 9:38am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was getting into the mood with my boyfriend. Ten minutes into it, I told him to "teach me a lesson." His response: "I ain't no teacher." FML

#20629715
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42555) - you deserved it (10601)

On 04/29/2013 at 3:08am - intimacy - by unforgettablee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was sent to group therapy. A girl spent twenty minutes telling us horrible details of having been raised incestuously. A side effect of my new medication is yawning. FML

Today, my sister was crying to me about how her boyfriend never showed up for their date. He's done this many times before, so I suggested the fact that maybe he'd just ditched her. She said that was ridiculous, because "he's Canadian" and according to her, "they don't lie." FML

#20621115
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41781) - you deserved it (4711)

On 04/25/2013 at 4:36pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, things got pretty steamy between my boyfriend and me. We started doing stuff that neither of us had tried before. Then, he straddled me with a raging erection and boomed, "IT HAS RISEN!" He didn't understand why I was suddenly no longer in the mood. FML

#20623610
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41765) - you deserved it (8529)

On 04/26/2013 at 6:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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