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Saturday 20 April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was feeling really sick at work. I messaged my boss whether his girlfriend, who also works there, could cover me. He then came down, shouting at me that whatever illness I have, I've also passed on to his girlfriend. I'm pregnant. FML

#20612786
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48329) - you deserved it (3500)

On 04/22/2013 at 9:22am - work - by work -_- - United Kingdom (Surrey)

Today, my long-distance girlfriend drunk dialed me and told me she was horny. Surprised, I exclaimed, "You're horny?" without realizing my boss was right next to me. FML

#20604222
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48328) - you deserved it (21264)

On 04/19/2013 at 2:00am - intimacy - by Wallz99 (man) - Pakistan (Azad Kashmir)

Today, my boyfriend and I attempted sexting for the first time. After about twenty minutes of Star Wars references, I gave up. FML

#20604154
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48138) - you deserved it (9425)

On 04/19/2013 at 1:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was told that I don't meet the minimum requirements for a job I applied for. I currently hold the same job, at the same facility, but just wanted a day shift. Apparently I'm not qualified for the job I've had for 2 and a half years. FML

#20611147
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48001) - you deserved it (3376)

On 04/21/2013 at 6:56pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today my ex-boyfriend accepted my mother's offer to have his wedding in our backyard. FML

#20616531
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47922) - you deserved it (3724)

On 04/23/2013 at 7:04pm - love - by traitor (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, in my psychology class we were covering OCDs. I have an issue with creased paper and my best friend brought it up, so for the next hour my class mates sat screwing up paper to see how long I could continuously have a panic attack. FML

Today, I was denounced for being a terrible person, because my family raises chickens, some of which we eat. I was then told how cruel I am for "killing innocent birds" and that "good" people buy their meat from the supermarket. FML

#20623167
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47832) - you deserved it (2934)

On 04/26/2013 at 2:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Mexico (Baja California)

Today, I grounded my son after finding out that he's been bullying other kids at school. He got mad and screamed at me, calling me a "bastard". Instead of defending me, my wife got pissed and accused me of having taught our son to swear like that. I can never win. FML

#20605834
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47816) - you deserved it (5535)

On 04/19/2013 at 7:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Kronobergs Lan)

Today, I took my Spanish test, and I felt very confident. I got the test back later, and saw my teacher had written on it: "Congrats on the 94%, but I know you cheated." FML

#20615717
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47483) - you deserved it (6977)

On 04/23/2013 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was admitted to the hospital for chronic constipation. I have to share a room with two other girls who are also having bowel problems. We're all on strong laxatives, and there's apparently only one bathroom in this place. FML

#20613283
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47299) - you deserved it (3045)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:10pm - health - by shatMyself - United States

Today, it's my only day off work in a while. I told my boss I'd be available via phone in case of emergencies. So far I've been called three times: To ask how the fax works, to let me know it's a slow day, and to ask me where the letter R is on a keyboard. FML

#20604416
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46989) - you deserved it (5504)

On 04/19/2013 at 6:17am - work - by Anonymous - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I had a note to skip P.E. that my grandpa had written because my mom was busy. His handwriting is terrible, so they didn't believe that he'd written it. I'd twisted my ankle and I got to run another mile for "lying". FML

#20615089
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46962) - you deserved it (3876)

On 04/23/2013 at 1:25am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate for the first time. A few hours later, we discovered he's highly allergic to my Summer's Eve soap. He looks like he's been attacked by bees. Yay for losing my v-card. FML

#20597351
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46951) - you deserved it (7386)

On 04/16/2013 at 7:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States



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