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Wednesday 27 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was babysitting, and after the kids fell asleep I started hiding the Easter candy. They woke up when I was half-done, and it didn't take them long to figure out what was going on. They won't stop crying, and every time I go near them, they scream "LIAR!" FML

#20569899
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33775) - you deserved it (7417)

On 04/01/2013 at 12:02pm - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was chatting with a co-worker, and she mentioned she has trouble swallowing pills. I replied that I'm lucky, because I have next to no gag reflex. Half the guys at the other registers abruptly went silent, and I'm now being constantly hit on. FML

#20564125
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33682) - you deserved it (15343)

On 03/28/2013 at 4:56pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, I was on a bumpy bus ride and had to write a note, so I held my notebook against the bus window to steady my hand. An elderly woman then yelled at me, accusing me of drawing graffiti on the window. The bus driver kicked me off and I had to wait an hour in the rain for the next bus. FML

#20561950
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33470) - you deserved it (2609)

On 03/27/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by 00sasori - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, while in a public bathroom, I threw out my back. A stranger had to help me pull up my pants. FML

#20563612
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33403) - you deserved it (2445)

On 03/28/2013 at 9:52am - health - by paulinapo - United States (New York)

Today, my cat learned how to open doors. Ever since then she's been running up to my room, opening my door, and running away. My cat is playing ding-dong ditch. FML

#20559057
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33337) - you deserved it (4470)

On 03/25/2013 at 3:18am - animals - by Apes (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was at my job, waiting tables. A fellow server and myself were given a party of 14 Bible thumpers. They left us $9.00 and a mini Bible after awesome service, telling us we did a great job. Unfortunately, Religion doesn't pay my car payment. FML

#20559101
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33323) - you deserved it (5823)

On 03/25/2013 at 4:48am - money - by PrayingForMoney - United States (California)

Today, I spent the whole night and day painting a portrait of my girlfriend. Being proud of it, I sent it to her hoping she would appreciate it. I spent hours working on that picture only for her to reply with, "That's not me, is it?" FML

#20565101
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33104) - you deserved it (4144)

On 03/29/2013 at 7:12am - love - by artist (woman) - Czech Republic (Hlavni mesto Praha)

Today, a man attempted to sue my business for giving him food poisoning. I make soap. When I called the cops on him for disturbing the peace, I was told, "Maybe next time you'll put 'not edible' on your label." FML

#20561443
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33102) - you deserved it (3409)

On 03/26/2013 at 8:10pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, at work while near a cigarette tray outside, a man said, "Thanks for polluting our environment!" All I could say was, "What?" He then said "I'm speaking English you know!" I was cleaning the cigarette tray at the time, don't smoke at all, and was born here. FML

#20564434
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32815) - you deserved it (2461)

On 03/28/2013 at 8:57pm - work - by TVKill3r (man) - United States

Today, I was buying condoms at Walmart. I grabbed the XL size, and the cashier commented, "Ahh, you'll definitely need a smaller size." FML

#20573161
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32736) - you deserved it (14124)

On 04/03/2013 at 12:57pm - misc - by nottoosmall - United States

Today, I went to the bank to find out why they've taken $200 from me. By the time I show them my bank card, ID and tell them my problem, they accuse me of stealing my own identity, and refuse to give me my money back. FML

#20561553
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32663) - you deserved it (2100)

On 03/26/2013 at 9:37pm - money - by arsenicalhumor (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was late to a lecture when I tripped up the stairs. With a few hundred people already staring and laughing at me, I started to curtsy to my "adoring fans" but instead fell backwards down the massive flight of stairs. FML

#20559000
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32583) - you deserved it (10984)

On 03/25/2013 at 2:03am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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