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Wednesday 27 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I told my husband that a guy I work with told me that I'm the most beautiful woman he has ever met. My husband replied, "He needs to get out more." FML

Today, while I was at work, I was on the verge of tears. My coworker asked what was wrong and I explained that I recently had to put my dog down. He then replied, "Cool story, bro. Tell it again." FML

#20565029
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39196) - you deserved it (3399)

On 03/29/2013 at 4:23am - work - by CoolStoryBro -

Today, my husband told me to look for a honeymoon resort, since we had to cancel it last year. I looked everything up and got all excited. Just when I asked him for payment information, he said "April Fools!" April Fools was two days ago. FML

#20573157
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38625) - you deserved it (3238)

On 04/03/2013 at 12:50pm - love - by letdown13 - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend, who moved in about a month ago, decided he wanted to move back out. Why? Because I don't keep my place clean enough for him. This, coming from the same man who refuses to wash or clean anything because "that's what women are for." FML

#20560431
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38492) - you deserved it (9704)

On 03/26/2013 at 12:15am - love - by ShouldBeSingleSoon (woman) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my boyfriend came over with a hickey on his neck. He thinks "The vacuum did it" is a believable excuse. FML

#20569989
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38486) - you deserved it (3938)

On 04/01/2013 at 1:17pm - love - by tkrause - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, the girl I thought I was dating got into a fight with me over the phone. She did this because she bet her boyfriend that she could make me cry on FaceTime. She won the bet. FML

#20567223
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38153) - you deserved it (5506)

On 03/30/2013 at 6:22pm - love - by J. Homen - United States

Today, my boss threatened to fire me for killing him in Minecraft. FML

#20571304
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37899) - you deserved it (7991)

On 04/02/2013 at 6:30am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the supermarket to get some Easter gifts for my kids. At the register, I was verbally abused to the point of tears by the cashier, for having way too many items for the 12 items or less lane. I had 13. FML

#20567111
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37882) - you deserved it (14726)

On 03/30/2013 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, my daughter got selected to pick music for a funeral. She only listens to Nikki Minaj. FML

#20560709
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37757) - you deserved it (5362)

On 03/26/2013 at 7:40am - kids - by bear - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was playing Draw Something with my girlfriend, when I decided to start a game with some other people. She immediately accused me of "cheating" on her, and still refuses to talk to me. FML

#20571699
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37619) - you deserved it (4749)

On 04/02/2013 at 2:14pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, the Chinese student I've been teaching English to got on stage in front of hundreds of people to read her final essay. She ended with, "What a fucking day." I don't swear, and I no longer have a job. FML

#20571924
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37516) - you deserved it (2614)

On 04/02/2013 at 5:14pm - work - by effiestonem154 (woman) - United States

Today, in my job as an assistant at a music venue, I had to get posters signed by that night's performer. When I walked into the dressing room, I was told, "unless you're sucking my cock then get the fuck out of here" and had the posters slapped out of my hands. It's my job to deal with these pricks. FML

#20572312
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37383) - you deserved it (3334)

On 04/02/2013 at 9:26pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I found out that the money that my wife claims went into repairing her car engine actually is going towards helping her pay for a divorce. FML

#20564887
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37333) - you deserved it (3170)

On 03/29/2013 at 1:37am - love - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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