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Sunday 24 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was chatting with a co-worker, and she mentioned she has trouble swallowing pills. I replied that I'm lucky, because I have next to no gag reflex. Half the guys at the other registers abruptly went silent, and I'm now being constantly hit on. FML

#20564125
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35766) - you deserved it (16019)

On 03/28/2013 at 4:56pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Champagne-Ardenne)

Today, I was cast as beast in my high school's production of Beauty and the Beast. My Grandma's input? "At least they won't need any makeup." FML

#20566521
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35682) - you deserved it (3642)

On 03/30/2013 at 2:57am - misc - by Beast - United States (Ohio)

Today, I woke up to my cat giving birth, on my bed. I adopted her from a friend, who told me she was spayed. Now I have a giant mess and a cat who won't let me move either her or her babies. Guess I'm sleeping on the couch for a while. FML

Today, I was on a bumpy bus ride and had to write a note, so I held my notebook against the bus window to steady my hand. An elderly woman then yelled at me, accusing me of drawing graffiti on the window. The bus driver kicked me off and I had to wait an hour in the rain for the next bus. FML

#20561950
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35617) - you deserved it (2801)

On 03/27/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by 00sasori - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I went to the bank to find out why they've taken $200 from me. By the time I show them my bank card, ID and tell them my problem, they accuse me of stealing my own identity, and refuse to give me my money back. FML

#20561553
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35378) - you deserved it (2301)

On 03/26/2013 at 9:37pm - money - by arsenicalhumor (woman) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I gave my son a fork, so I could try teaching him how to eat with one. So far, he's been doing all the teaching. He's taught me that if I get anywhere near him when he has a fork, I'll get shanked. FML

Today, my department found out that we're getting a new supervisor for the third time this month. I joked about how we're like "the foster kid nobody wants." One of my coworkers burst into tears and ran off. I later found out that she had been a foster child and never once had a stable home. FML

#20550513
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35337) - you deserved it (28059)

On 03/19/2013 at 5:59am - work - by Luke - United States (New York)

Today, I was at my job, waiting tables. A fellow server and myself were given a party of 14 Bible thumpers. They left us $9.00 and a mini Bible after awesome service, telling us we did a great job. Unfortunately, Religion doesn't pay my car payment. FML

#20559101
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35033) - you deserved it (6008)

On 03/25/2013 at 4:48am - money - by PrayingForMoney - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my recurring acne is actually bedbug bites. I have wasted about a hundred dollars on acne cream. FML

#20549483
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34929) - you deserved it (7264)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:30pm - health - by thisentiretime... - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was complaining to my husband about a busty but vapid celebrity, and he replied, "She doesn't need brains, honey, she has boobs. You wouldn't understand." FML

#20557361
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34878) - you deserved it (6232)

On 03/24/2013 at 1:14am - love - by Beestings (woman) - United States

Today, I had to proof-read a terrible paper containing a bunch of mistakes. It took me 4 hours and I didn't eat dinner until I was done. His response when he got it back was, "What the fuck did you do to my paper?! You bitch!" FML

#20569253
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34859) - you deserved it (3015)

On 03/31/2013 at 10:59pm - misc - by pissed_off_girl - United States (Virginia)

Today, a man attempted to sue my business for giving him food poisoning. I make soap. When I called the cops on him for disturbing the peace, I was told, "Maybe next time you'll put 'not edible' on your label." FML

#20561443
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34769) - you deserved it (3533)

On 03/26/2013 at 8:10pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while working in childcare, we went to a farm so the kids could see how things worked. They started showing off prize winning cattle and when they bought out "Miss Stacey", the kids lost their shit. My name is Miss Stacey. FML

#20550321
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34713) - you deserved it (3063)

On 03/19/2013 at 1:00am - work - by seriously! - Australia (New South Wales)



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