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Sunday 24 March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I turned 18. My parents got me a pineapple and a pair of socks. I'm allergic to pineapple, and the socks are too small. FML

#20566329
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38460) - you deserved it (2680)

On 03/30/2013 at 12:06am - misc - by ShellShocked - United States

Today, my roommates decided to hold an intervention. They told me I would have to break up with my boyfriend because they don't want people having sex in our apartment during college exams. My boyfriend agreed. FML

#20558428
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38395) - you deserved it (5102)

On 03/24/2013 at 7:21pm - intimacy - by Tooloud (woman) - Canada

Today, I was hit by a car in a parking lot. The person sped off; I broke three ribs. My parents screamed at me for not getting the driver's info. FML

#20565033
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38320) - you deserved it (2564)

On 03/29/2013 at 4:33am - misc - by TheRuleEnforcer (man) - United States

Today, while I was at work, I was on the verge of tears. My coworker asked what was wrong and I explained that I recently had to put my dog down. He then replied, "Cool story, bro. Tell it again." FML

#20565029
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38147) - you deserved it (3325)

On 03/29/2013 at 4:23am - work - by CoolStoryBro -

Today, my friend asked to borrow my new laptop to email his college professor. When he returned it, it had a virus on it, and I had to fish out two pubic hairs that were sticking out between the keys. FML

#20559514
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38066) - you deserved it (6998)

On 03/25/2013 at 2:25pm - misc - by grossed out - United Kingdom (Peterborough)

Today, I woke up next to my girlfriend. I was woken up by my mother breaking into my house to tell me I need to get ready for work. Then she got mad that I had a girl over. I'm 20. FML

#20561180
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38063) - you deserved it (4639)

On 03/26/2013 at 4:20pm - misc - by holycommander - United States

Today, my husband woke up, rolled over, and said, "Good morning, beautiful." He hasn't called me that in months, but as I was about to reply, I realized he was talking to his pet turtle, not me. FML

#20549421
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37990) - you deserved it (3094)

On 03/18/2013 at 3:38pm - love - by Maggie - United States

Today, there was a new girl in one of my classes. We both corrected a classmate on his grammar, so, trying to make a new friend, I leaned back to her and said, "Haha, fellow Grammar Nazi?" She gave me a disgusted look and told me she was Jewish. FML

#20553379
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37971) - you deserved it (19460)

On 03/21/2013 at 6:43am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was violently throwing up due to severe morning sickness. My boyfriend looked at me, then turned and walked away. In the end, my daughter gave me some paper towel and her juice. My 18-month-old is more supportive of my pregnancy than her 30-year-old father. FML

#20562509
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37920) - you deserved it (5547)

On 03/27/2013 at 3:34pm - misc - by InfamousLastWord (woman) - United States

Today, I learned that my parents are planning to divorce. My dad said, "I'll take Rachel." Rachel isn't even his daughter; I am. Rachel is my mom's daughter with her first husband. FML

#20567711
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37849) - you deserved it (2487)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was feeling a bit insecure about my body, and I told my boyfriend I don't know how he can even stand to have sex with me. He replied, "I know, right?" FML

#20555435
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37821) - you deserved it (18110)

On 03/22/2013 at 7:21pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I told my husband that a guy I work with told me that I'm the most beautiful woman he has ever met. My husband replied, "He needs to get out more." FML

Today, I was at McDonald's. As I left the counter with the food, I heard the cashier mutter, "Fat ass." I turned around and demanded to see the manager. Once he came and heard the situation, he looked at me and said, "Well, it's not like he's wrong, right?" FML

#20561915
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37641) - you deserved it (17488)

On 03/27/2013 at 1:04am - health - by first time at McDonald's in months... - United States



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