Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

Thursday 21 February 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, during a silent breathing meditation at the Buddhist center, I accidentally let one rip which echoed through the meditation chamber. If that wasn't bad enough, the follow-up odor was enough to fell a charging rhinoceros. FML

#20517185
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27892) - you deserved it (7776)

On 02/22/2013 at 2:57am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, after scouring my apartment for quarters to do laundry, I found the correct amount of change. The change got jammed in the washing machine. I now have no more quarters, and my clothes are caked with soap from washing them in the sink. FML

#20524387
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27696) - you deserved it (3709)

On 02/27/2013 at 1:27pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I had an important job interview at another company. I'd tried to keep it secret from everyone at work, so they wouldn't tell my boss, as I can't afford to get on his bad side yet. My mom posted on my Facebook wall, wishing me luck. I'm Facebook friends with most of my colleagues. FML

#20525834
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27539) - you deserved it (11234)

On 02/28/2013 at 4:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Finland (Southern Finland)

Today, I realized that the only positive accomplishment my boyfriend has made in the last 3 years is that he started wearing deodorant. FML

#20525032
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27447) - you deserved it (7578)

On 02/27/2013 at 10:28pm - love - by butterflyzag20 - United States

Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML

#20526426
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27443) - you deserved it (7072) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/28/2013 at 8:55pm - health - by JimiHendrix (man) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today, I went to the doctor to get a blood test and I started crying when I saw the needle. I planned on becoming a doctor. FML

#20519825
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26658) - you deserved it (12981)

On 02/24/2013 at 4:34am - health - by Caroline - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I went back home after seeing the doctor, I told my boyfriend my new medicine might cause some mood swings. He immediately grabbed his phone and pretended to take a call, then rushed out. FML

#20516690
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26606) - you deserved it (3376)

On 02/21/2013 at 8:21pm - health - by NewDrugs (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I heard a commercial for a great apartment complex. Includes food, snacks, entertainment, activities, cleaning service, and transportation services if you cannot drive yourself. I was really excited until the end when they repeated the name; too bad my perfect place is a senior center. FML

#20514672
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26395) - you deserved it (8178)

On 02/20/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by kryan012 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I realized that the "eyelash curling brush" that my best friend found in my old bathroom drawer was actually a stick used for cleaning food out of my sister's braces. I used that thing for years. FML

#20519962
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26359) - you deserved it (13753)

On 02/24/2013 at 9:30am - misc - by curly_eyelashes - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a two dollar raise. Unfortunately, I recently accepted a transfer to a job on the other side of the state to what was, at the time, a more lucrative position. I can't cancel it, so now I get to move into a pay cut. FML

#20514453
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25691) - you deserved it (6080)

On 02/20/2013 at 1:33am - work - by MeanGina (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I went in to get my first tattoo. I'd put a lot of thought into it and was really excited when the day came. Long story short, the Celtic knot I'd gotten turned out to have an alternate meaning of "female sex slave." The faces my very Irish family made were beyond words. FML

#20511821
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19442) - you deserved it (47935)

On 02/18/2013 at 3:50am - intimacy - by UnluckyInk (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was hanging out with the guy I really like. I lifted my arms to put my hair in a ponytail when he noticed a hole that had apparently tore in the armpit of my shirt, so he put his finger through it. I haven't shaved in weeks. FML

#20513075
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19139) - you deserved it (53973)

On 02/19/2013 at 1:19am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: