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November 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I found out that since there are 3 people with the same name as me at work, I'm known as "the ugly one". FML

#20973400
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46781) - you deserved it (3434)

On 11/28/2013 at 6:41am - work - by anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I found myself admiring my eyelids for being the only parts of my face not covered in acne. FML

#20960938
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46767) - you deserved it (4353)

On 11/17/2013 at 2:11pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, my workplace had a big employee photoshoot for an ad campaign. I was there all of 30 seconds before the photographer said, "What the fuck? Look guys, this ain't an ad for facial abortions." He then asked me and another colleague to step out of the shot. FML

#20969207
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46732) - you deserved it (3670)

On 11/24/2013 at 4:38pm - work - by fuggers :/ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hampshire)

Today, while teaching juniors about black holes, I said, "Imagine everything being sucked into a black hole." An African-American student shouted, "I'd better start clenching!" Nobody took the lesson seriously after that. FML

#20946225
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46719) - you deserved it (5645)

On 11/05/2013 at 8:22am - work - by regretsteachinghighschool - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boss declared total bankruptcy of the company and I lost my job. The good news is my coworkers and I all received McDonald's 10%-off coupons. They expired in 2003. FML

#20963285
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46639) - you deserved it (2795)

On 11/19/2013 at 11:50am - work - by Anonymous -

Today, I found out that my sex face is definitely amusing after the third girl in a row started laughing at it. FML

#20945549
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46549) - you deserved it (8417)

On 11/04/2013 at 7:25pm - intimacy - by UnfortunatelyAmusing (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I realized that no matter what I accomplish in life, I'll always be remembered for being the son of a woman so stupid that she claimed she used to be Elvis Presley's mistress. She was still an infant when he died. FML

#20968220
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46531) - you deserved it (3157)

On 11/23/2013 at 6:45pm - misc - by fs (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my boyfriend's response to me saying "Most women like a bit of filth in the bedroom every now and again" was to start farting in bed. Not quite what I meant. FML

#20946422
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46521) - you deserved it (11223)

On 11/05/2013 at 1:01pm - intimacy - by roughsexgonewrong (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, somebody broke into my car, just to steal the obviously fake $1,000,000 bill hanging from my rear-view mirror. FML

#20951747
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46437) - you deserved it (11498)

On 11/09/2013 at 6:27pm - money - by jsyn (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I walked under a tree and heard birds chirping from above. I stopped and looked up, only to catch a face full of bird shit. FML

#20947706
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46310) - you deserved it (9235)

On 11/06/2013 at 1:08pm - animals - by lbg2msf (man) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I realized I need to start hitting the gym, when my boyfriend actually utilized my love handles during sex. FML

Today, I was mentioning to a coworker how there was a huge lull today in business. A young coworker then turns to me and says in a snooty tone, "I think you mean a 'lol', it's pronounced L-O-L." FML

#20953649
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46164) - you deserved it (3099)

On 11/11/2013 at 5:36am - work - by shut up. - New Zealand

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have our first kiss with each other, but my dog decided to let one rip, stinking up the whole room. My boyfriend still doesn't believe it was my dog who did it. FML

#20960650
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46086) - you deserved it (4193)

On 11/17/2013 at 8:34am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)



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