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September 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, the guy I love asked me if hooking up counted as dating, because he thinks I'm "super hot," but he doesn't want "all the relationship shit." FML

#20874228
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45232) - you deserved it (4888)

On 09/09/2013 at 8:46am - love - by Renagirl (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, at my job as a fourth grade teacher, I realized that most of my students have far nicer and more expensive phones than I can afford. FML

#20892987
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45232) - you deserved it (3418)

On 09/23/2013 at 1:54pm - misc - by poor teacher - United States (Utah)

Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old daughter holding a lit lighter to the underside of a spoon, which was full of baking powder. She was trying to breathe in the fumes to get high, and later confessed that she thought it's how heroin is made and used. FML

#20879909
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45188) - you deserved it (5439)

On 09/13/2013 at 5:40pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I had an interview for my dream job. I spent all of last night preparing, researching the company, and making sure everything was perfect. My interview was for 8am. I woke up at 10:30 to an alarm that had not gone off. FML

#20886551
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45188) - you deserved it (7263)

On 09/18/2013 at 1:41pm - work - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was cutting a client's hair, and she was complaining about how itchy her head was from having it too long. As I lay down my comb and shears, three lice bugs ran across my counter. FML

Today, I found out my extremely anti-war relatives hate me because they think I served in the Army, after hearing I was "a vet". I'm a veterinarian. FML

#20876113
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44990) - you deserved it (2781)

On 09/10/2013 at 7:30pm - work - by the next james herriot (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I was at work at Krispy Kreme for national "talk like a pirate" day. If you dressed like a pirate you'd get a free dozen donuts. A man came in with just an eyepatch on. Thinking he was trying to get a free dozen, I told him he needed to try harder. Turned out the eyepatch was real. FML

#20888238
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44961) - you deserved it (12465)

On 09/19/2013 at 8:47pm - work - by Jamie - United States (Virginia)

Today, a shopper asked me where my nipples were. Seeing as I work in Babies'R'Us, this is a common question. I brought her over to the nursing equipment aisle where she then grabbed my nipples, gave them a twist, and walked away. I need a new job. FML

Today, after I explained to my waitress that I have an allergy to butter, she nonetheless put some on my baked potato. When I had her get me another, without butter, she came back with one and then asked if I would like butter with it. FML

#20862628
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44901) - you deserved it (3152)

On 09/01/2013 at 12:40am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, while working at Home Depot, I was asked to cut some wire. When I asked her how much, she said, "From my computer to the wall". After explaining for a while that I didn't know how far that is, she left. FML

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She said yes, but the ring turned out to be quite tight on her finger. She then chewed me out, saying that I can't do anything right, then changed her answer to no. FML

#20899091
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44889) - you deserved it (3862)

On 09/28/2013 at 12:25pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Serbia

Today, my dad tore my room apart for the second time, looking for drug-making equipment. His reasoning is that I must be dealing drugs, because I'm a chemistry major who likes to watch Breaking Bad. FML

#20863540
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44829) - you deserved it (3236)

On 09/01/2013 at 7:06pm - misc - by WaltTheFuckDad (man) - United States (California)

Today, my company is doing so bad that I had to take down my symbolic first dollar so that I could buy a roll of crackers for dinner. FML

#20865414
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44769) - you deserved it (3397)

On 09/02/2013 at 11:03pm - work - by smurftastic (man) - United States (California)



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